The big achiever

[jjaammeess]

Hi I am retired now but I have seen this happen so often.In work a chap works so hard for years and does a really good job---takes work home etc and has all the qualifications.Then this rather arrogant (usually young) great talking confident chap joins the firm with less qualifications and experience and is promoted over the hard working chap causing great bitterness My point is--should we not be educating our children to be first and foremost self confident public speakers because qualifications are 2 a penny. It has happened in my bowling club.The president is the minister and never plays bowls.The secretary cant bowl straight.The captain joined a short time ago and is less than average etc.etc.But the one thing they can all do is speak well in public --- any comments----James

[OBonio]

It's all about blowing your own trumpet. No-one else will do it for you. Taken me 10 years to gain the confidence to do this. If I feel I'm being challenged by another in my particular field of expertise, I'll not hesitate to tear their ideas to shreds. In a nice way, of course.

[liquidspace]

I would love to know how to speak confidently in public and not feel completely self conscious to the point of being bright red and not being able to breathe!

[cruella]

Hi jjaammeess,
Think the problem here is not so much that they are good public speakers, although that probably has some bearing on it.
With most clubs, it appears that they are in a clique.
Also, because of the jobs they do, it is probably the fact that they are more confident in themselves, probably to the point of arrogance.

[Octavius]

Well I would say that I have achieved lots in my life, I have a successful career, I am a confident public speaker (seminars, speeches etc), but I wouldn�t say I was a confident outgoing person. The old adage �not what you know, its who you know� is so often true, but in many situations you will find that people who �have the talk� will often do so to cover up their inexperience or educational misgivings and these people will be liked by those above because of their self-convincing bravado. Note, my pet hate: The Apprentice.

I think you are right to suggest that children should be taught social skills to gain inner confidence, but this should be from the home and from parents. This should also be substantiated by a sound educational background through school and home.