The WORST thing EVER

[Supernick]

Something unbelievable had happened to me, and there is no-one I can tell. It might give some people a few cheap laughs though on a slow Wednesday.

To give you a setting, I'm in a busy office at work. I just popped into the only gents toilet that we have, containing 2 urinals and a cubicle. One of the urinals was busy, so I stepped into the cubicle, thinking that as well as having a p1ss I could also free up my boxers that were bunched rather uncomfortably around my upper thighs. So i pulled my trousers down, and smoothed them out. Then I started having a **** (with trousers round ankles which is an odd thing in itself), and as I was doing it, I started looking around and reading the back of an air feshner.
Suddenly, the awful thing happened. I realised that rather than p1ssing into the toilet, I had managed to somehow catch a bit of my boxers that were standing out a bit. I had been urinating for quite a while, and it was only when they were saturated that I noticed because my leg suddenly became wet. Worse, most of the p1ss had accumulated in my trousers which are still bunched around my ankles. I really have no idea how I couldn't have noticed this, but i'm now in a situation where my trousers and boxers are soaked.
Panicking, I tried drying them off with toilet paper, and flapping my trousers around, but I used so much paper, that I've blocked the toilet, and the flush has left it dangerously close to 'overflow'.
I emerged 15 minutes after going in with a blocked toilet and trousers still soaking wet. This is the worst day ever.

[mccfluff]

lmao, thanks nick that gave me a well needed giggle, if it makes you feel any better i got lucozade on my top and had to take it off to wash it and then got caught in the loos in just my bra (and trews) whilst drying it, that was fairly embarrasing

[Supernick]

Right. I'm completely dry and well aired now. There is no issue with stain, and I've employed my Febreeze plan. There is no discerbible smell from that either, as i doused my tousers in McDonalds and then walked it off again. I'm going to get away with this.

I would buy new trousers, but I'm wearing a suit with a faint pin stripe to it. There's no way I could change without people asking me why....

[~max~]

ROFL!!! that word "shart" made me laugh like an eejit at my desk, I actually snorted! lol
Heard it first in that movie "Along came Polly" the other day, love it! I think it's one of teh best neologisms ever!

[jump79]

Good thing you have a desk job ... when you get home, burn the trousers and underpants. Remember to always carry a spare pair of both in your handbag/briefcase from now on

[redhead23]

hahahaaha i love it , it could of been worse i dont know how i thought bad stuff like that only happened to me , i ran over a stinger at a exclusive club and thought the stinger would go down as my car passed !!!
yep the blimin stinger stayed and i got 4 yes 4 punctures was mortified plus it was very exspensive

[knobbynonuts]

Just goes to show that when you go toilet always take barry scott in there with you as you never know when you might need his clitty bang........

[knobbynonuts]

or should that read sh itty bang.......