Love-again

[pastafreak]

Following on from Legends question...would you stay in a long-term relationship with someone who never said "I love you"? and would you be worried /bothered if they didn't? Are the words an important part of how you express love for someone?

[Black Noir]

Speaking from the other side of the equation I have always struggled to say those 3 little words, I have wanted to so many times and it is crushing not being able to do so, and a massive regret when my Dad died,its just the way some people are brought up I think - I have always felt stupid and embarrased when I hear myself saying it, even to my kids !

I have been better and felt easier about saying I love you since meeting Mr BN, but i know its still not often enough :(

[unruliejulie]

Not the be all and end all but i do like to be told! Of course expressing love is way more important though.

[raysparx1]

I have no problem telling people if I love them, I tell my 2 sons who are grown men, but the important thing as julie said is showing people you love them, in the little things you do and by showing you care, some say it without any thought as to what it means, then it is worthless.

[SizzleSquid]

my boyfriend never said it for 7 years, i know he did, becaause he said it in different ways, but could never say "i love you" he found it too hard, but now on our 8th year he can say yes i do love you when asked, but still cant say it on his own. you know when someone does or doesnt

[~Wingnut~]

I'm a bit like you Black Noir (hello!) I struggle to say I love you to anyone other than my husband and 2 children. My husband and I always tell each other lots of times every day "I love you" but I can't to others. It has become a bit of a joke with our family as my sister emigrated and I haven't seen her for over 3 years. At the end of every phone conversation, she says "Miss you and I love you" and I usually reply with a mumble "Yeah I know" she just laughs. She knows I love her and miss her terribly but all my family also know I don't show my feelings very well.
I keep all my emotions under lock and key and usually end up pouring it all out to my husband :o)

[pastafreak]

I agree with a lot of the sentiment expressed by all of you particularly Wingnut. Tho I am settled here in England,I have not seen my brother in the States for almost 12 years. I will sign my e-mails with'love ya' but never go any further than that. In relationships tho,if the FEELING is there I really NEED to say those words...it is a very important part of the person I am. Unfortunatly the Brit I was married to for 24yrs responded with his own "prince charles moment"-saying he didn't know what love was!! lol Could it be a cultural thing?

[raysparx1]

Hi pasta, don't think it is cultural, I think it just depends on the individual, some people find it very hard to say those words, I don't find it hard, the first time I said it to my then girlfriend I was so scared in case she just never said anything, but she cried, and said I have been wanting you to say that for months. but if as you say there is a silence, then a debate on, well what is love, so next time you mail them or speak to them just say it, after that it will be easy.