Friends

[miffy63]

Do you think it's possible for men and women to be just friends. There's a bloke at work who I've been chatting to and I really like him, I don't fancy him. He has a great sense of humour and is just a nice guy.

[miffy63]

The problem is that I'm a natural flirt and I would hate for him to get the wrong idea. How do I make it clear that I just want friendship? I confess that I've thought about ripping his clothes off but it didn't thrill me one bit.

[cazzz1975]

I am friends with a few guys, I have no interest (in that way) in any of them, I dont even fantasise. you can be friends with the opposite sex without anything untoward!!

I treat a male friend the same as a female friend for the most part (probably spare them from discussing PMT and suchlike )

[Emz26]

I think that men and women can be just friends, no problem. I probably have more male friends than female friends and I have absolutely no interest in them sexually. In fact, the thought of it makes me shudder.... with most of them anyway. lol x

[leelapops]

I think it can be totally platonic. My partner doesn't: it has caused problems in the past! He is much older than me and I think his early friendship experiences were very different, especially as he was in the army.

You make a good point: he has to know that you only want to be his friend. Try and subdue your flirting (even a "natural" flirt knows where the boundaries are, or should be!) and don't take any "leads" he might give.

Lisa x

[cazzz1975]

selective star giving???, did I not give you the answer you wanted??

maybe you fancy the guy in reality and you want to believe that men and women cant be friends?

[miffy63]

Thanks Legend, the trouble is that I don't think men and women can just be friends either. I always start to flirt, something I don't do with women, and there's always this challenge at the back of mind mind to make 'him' fancy me. I think it's a no go area for me which is a shame because I like him.

[miffy63]

I would never take it that far, it's the thrill of the chase. I don't want to shag him or anyone other than my boyfriend, flirting is something I have always done, my boyfriend doesn't mind because he knows it for what it is.

[Lonnie]

Viva La Difference,.

Yes, its possible, but bl00dy hard, you may not fancy him in that way, but even if he doesn't say so, you can bet your life he fancies you.

[annie0000]

I have lots of friends at work who are men, but is because i usually get on better with guys - I treat them pretty much the same way as i treat my female work friends - I don't fancy them, and i am pretty certain that they don't fancy me. We chat about our partners and kids and telly and what we are doing at the weekend, go and get our lunch from the canteen together etc. My husband has worked in an environment that is predominately women, and therefore he chats about the woman at work he is friends with - I am absolutely positive that there is nothing going on.

I also get on better with my husbands best friend than I do with his best friends wife - I don't fancy him at all, I just have more in common with him than I do with his wife.

Having said all that, i met my husband at work, but we both knew straight away that it was more than a friendship.

[Cockney_si]

Yes as long as he understands that you're not going to date him or dissappear into the sunset wih him from the outset.

A lot of blokes when they first chat to girls they are interested in feel like they are getting somewhere when they find the woman likes them and has time to talk to them.

Be friends but like I said, make sure he knows it is just friends or it could turn messy.

[pigeon toes]

when i look back at all my male friends that iv had, there has almost always been something gone on between, weather iv fancied him, or he's fancied me, or we'v snogged ect, there was always something. Out of all my male friands i have now i think there is only 1 that has only been a plain and simple 'friendship'. But i do also think aswell tho that males and females can be just mates.