Am I being unreasonable?

[nikkster]

My husband and I are expecting our first child in 4 weeks, we are both over the moon about it ,,,however we can't decide on the name , He wants our son to be named after his dad,( whome I dislike with great intensity) I want us to find a name that we both are happy with,he is not in favour of the baby having a middle name....he did tell me on our first date that if he had a son he would be named after his father,however it's making me sad because i can't imagine my beautiful boy having the same name as his dad , we have had HUGE fights about this....help!!!!!

[yummymum]

what is the fathers name? can it be made into something else or made shorter

[quizzywig]

I would say that he can have his father's name but only as a second name. You do not want your son to be called something junior or little something. That way you both get what you want.

[meltoadhall]

i have to say that I'd make it into a middle name and keep trying to find another name you like - otherwise start hoping for a girl !! Is it definitly a boy?
what is the name? is the name itself that bad or just the fact it's your father in law? or get to the registry office first!

Some babies arrive and the name that was chosen does not suit them at all, have several standbys ready

[nikkster]

His dad's name is Evo and my husband wants our son to be called Evano.... It's not the same name but i know it's after his dad...It's not the name that's bad it's his dad , he is kinda mean and rude . I want my husband to be happy , but that would make me very sad and i'd refrain from calling our son his given name....

[ChuffingHell]

Presumably your husband knows your feelings towards his father? If so, I would be quite insistant on this. Its all well and good him saying what he wants, but you have a say on this too as the child is both of yours. Offer a compromise - have evano as a middle name as it clearly means a lot to him - but I'd stick to your guns if it really makes you unhappy.

That said, if you're just trying to spite his father by not naming the baby after him, then maybe you need to address your issues with this man as thats not really fair on your husband.

[annie0000]

How would your husband feel if you insisted that your child be names after your father?

I guess from the name that this is probably a traditional thing within his culture to name the child after their grandfather so it is probably important to him on a number of levels. Why not let him give him that as a first name, but have a middle name that you will use on a day to day basis, so that the first name becomes redundant?

As has been said, the other issue here is your relationship with his father - you may find find that this changes when you are the mother of his grandchild. If not, you cannot have him treat you badly especially in front of your child as this will undermine you as their mother. This may allow you to limit your contact with him for the sake of your child!

[missrandom]

Its your baby too, and if you dont want a name that much, its his tough luck and vice versa if there was a name you wanted that he really detested. I would opt for the father in laws name as a middle name, and find another you can bothe aggree on.

[Neilzulu1]

Tell him straight you will not let your baby have your husbands dads name,tell him it would not be fair on your child as he grows up he might have the mickey taken out of him,stick to your guns and good luck