jealous partner

[hannah03]

pease help me my partner is so jealous, i dont know wot to do im 400 miles away from home and have no one. me and my daughters father saperated 8 yours ago but have kept in touch for our daughters sake, recently he bought my daughter a web cam so they could see and talk to each other, basically tonight my partner made me chose between him or the web cam, im bein fourced to chose between my partner or my daughters happiness, my partner woz in dept when i met him and i paid this off on my credit card without him i cant afford to make the monthly repayments i fell trapped please help

[lex15]

hi
your daughter comes first every time! you dont need someone like that in your life-we're only here once and you shpuld make the most of your life. i would either talk to him and tell him how you feel or just get rid.
and dont worry bout the finacial side of things there are people out there that understand and can help you with repayments.
honestly, nooone should make you choose between them and your children - its just not right
x

[hannah03]

oh no jealouse boyfriend here. yes she did pay off a debt which i will pay back hand on heart along with a vets bill 4 her dog a few hundred and the 42" plasma which is also hers to keep pn i have been supporting her and kids with money etc 4 past year n no regrets about that. web cam hmmm well the ex of eldist daughter is 1 who wants it in house. reason against dont want it intruding on our privicy although daughter can c her father on his along with step sisters. reason she split with him used to beat her up reg so no dont want him intruding seeing what we have dont have. my jealousy well more of lack of trust. came home unexpected 1 night found gf on couch snuggling up with her mates fella nothing in it i believe her he just popped round 4 chat after dropping his drunk girlfriend home. . she was getting texts off this guy she said wasnt in contact with any more but swore down kids lives the lot she wasnt again lied. now this thing on here well think beter leave scince making her so unhappy even though she told me i wasnt. finacialy (spelt wrong grrr) she is safe but i have just about had enough. sure there is more to her side as there was to mine. i agree with lex s answer in as much as he new from the post he wrote. tc

[leighkaty]

is it not possible to compromise here. cant you put the webcam in her room i understand it could be potentially dangerous regarding using it to view other people who arent who they say they are, or could you not put it out of view of your living area, webcams only have a small eyeline, just make the lttle girl involved promise not to give a guided tour of your house with it, understand both sides of the arguement here, the bf not wanting his privacy invaded ( i wouldnt n dont think id allow it in my living area) and also the fact the daughter may want to see her dad on the webcam but also the dad may want to see the daughter

[Psychick]

Hmmmm......hannahs partner....as much I respect you for realising that maybe its for the best that you leave as your making hannah upset and that youre still willing to help her finacially as you have been doing.......I dont think your reasons for not wanting her daughter to have the webcam are enough. You are using things that have nothing to do with her daughters relationship with her father as excuses. If you dont trust hannah....dont take it out on her daughter. What so bad about him seeing what you do and dont have? Thats just your male pride getting in the way? Just because her daughter uses a webcam, doesnt mean the father will see everything! It sounds to me the problems to do with you and hannah are basically down to what she has/hasnt done in the past and your lack of trust for her.
Maybe its time you two sat down together and had a real long talk about how you both feel and what you both want.

Good luck to both of you.

Just one more thing........how did you find out about hannah coming here for advice and posting with her username?

[leighkaty]

i disagree, how can you say his male pride is the reason he doesnt want a webcam in the house, i actually agree with him on that i wouldnt like it and prob wouldnt let my daughter have one to see her dad unless it was out of the way so he couldnt see what was going on in my house, its not that i have anything to hide i just wouldnt want my privacy invaded, but like i said before webcams only have a small eyeline so positioned in the right place it should be ok, put yourself in his position, have to admit tho its a bit childish giving an ultimatum like you or the webcam