am i wasting my time

[caz247]

I had been seeing a guy for a few months and
he had booked a holiday with a work colleague before
we met. Anyway the other guy couldn't go so I went and
we had a fantastic week in Greece. We had planned a
second hol in September and I thought things were great
until Sat morn when he texted and said please don''t hate
me there is a lot of luv between us and we have had a fantastic few months but i don't think we will work out.
I am so confused as we texted all Fri nite and nothing in the texts gave me the indication he was unhappy.No contact until last nite he sent a few texts saying I want to be single. Am I wasting my time or has he got cold feet.
Honest opinions please

[Panic Button]

What a little **** he is, doing it by text. Walk away with your head held high. He isn't worth it and you are best off without him.

[confused79]

Did you get the impression he may have met someone else, was your relasionship serious, i mean was you just seeing him or was you girlfriend and boyfriend so to speak.

If you was getting on so well, something must have been going through his mind? Can i ask how old you and him are?

It could be that he has gotton scared of committment, you just cant tell.

I think its very out of order he sent you a text that is very cowardly to do that and very insensitive. I think you have a right to know and try speaking to him about it, just ask why. If he avoids you, then to be honest i dont think he is worth it, if he has a lot of luv for you then he wouldnt end things with you like this.

Good luck x

[ChuffingHell]

I'm a bit confused by your q - are you wasting your time doing what? Waiting for him?

I think he's made himself quite clear about the fact he wants to be single. I would also add that if after being together for a matter of months, if he doesn't have the decency to call you at the VERY least, then he's pathetic and really not worth the time of day. Texting to end relationships is what children do, not adults.

If I were you, I'd write back saying you're suprised to hear that from him but that you're even more suprised that he didn't have the decency to have a conversation with you on the matter in person and with all that in mind - given how cowardly he is, or how little he appears values you - you're glad to be rid of him.

[caz247]

he is 39 and i am 42, we talked on holiday about the future
and possibly living together. he lives with his mum just now. we had both been single about 18 months before we got together. one of the texts on fri said i miss loads xx what are we doing 2moro nite, can't tell u how much i luv u.
that's why i am so confused as to why his feelings changed. when he texted last nite i replied what changed ur mind , why did u tell me u loved me . his reply was please just let things be

[confused79]

Im even more surprised he ended it by texts seeing he is 42.
To me there has to be something more in it than him just wanting to be single.
If he still avoids you, then i would try and move on as it doesnt seem he deserves you, its so nasty to play with someones feeling like he is with you

[confused79]

sorry i meant 39 i just realised you are 42

[CheekyChops]

I'm more worried about why he lives with his mum at the age of 39.

Has he been hurt badly in the past? Maybe he is scared that you will do the same.

I think you really should leave it for now, if he does love you and comes to his senses soon then good. If not then just chalk it up to experience.

As has been said, a text is rather a cowardly way out at his age, maybe you are best out of it.

[yes-doc]

I think he's run off to think about things, just leave him to dwell on it and if he comes round great.

But i tell you becareful, because he'll do it again, he's selfish. and week

[sosad]

At least you got a text, i just got ignored. why do men do that? I think i'll post this as a question.

thanks you've made me feel a little better - sorry i know what your going through and your not on your own!! believe me

[Trinny]

yeah I wonder how men can just ignore you. I was dumped via text sosad, then got back with him, and was dumped via text. Am in my 40's too, and so was he....anyway, sorry rambled a bit. I would just try and forget him. I can guarantee he will contact you in a few weeks time. Really try and ignore him . I know its difficult.

Read this

http://www.randomhouse.com/broadway/breakup/it scalledabreakup.htm

[johnlambert]

We do it that way because we are weak and spinless sosad
I once left a girl sitting alone in restaurant because she was clingy (and had a nasty habit of leaving floaters in the toilet) and I cant count the number of times I've turned my back on a girl who has been a one night stand when I've seen her out with her friends later.
caz247, you say he lives with his mum? do you think see put some emotional pressure on him to give you up?

[caz247]

hi john

he has always lived at home and since his dad died it
has just been him and his mum, to be honest she is a
lovely person and i get on well with her. I think he just likes
his life as it is and i need to accept that.

[Trinny]

Sorry caz. I thought I was replying to sosad. Got a bit muddled. But my answer applies to you. Read the book caz, its funny, and very informative. xx

[johnlambert]

sounds like he is set in his ways hen
move on, sorry to be blunt but heyho thats me, there's loads of guys out there you can invest your time on, it will be his loss.