sleeping problems

[hussy]

please please can anybody help me!!! my baby is over 2 and still not sleeping through the night she wakes up for drink with teat bout 6 times in the night very hyper child; apart from leaving her scream all night for her bottle what can i do??? has very bad tantrums although very loving as well!! does she need medication? and does anybody else have this problem? i am recked tired!!!!!!

[ethanryan]

hi i have a 2 year old and 1 year old. when my son was about 18 months old he used to do the same. i would get up and give it him all the time untill i couldnt take no more. i decided to give him his drink of pop for bed and if he woke in the night i gave him water. which he didnt really like. after a few nights he realised that he wasnt having anymore pop and stopped waking up. He never needed the drink it was just habbit. now he sleeps through and if he does wake on the odd occasion i let him have pop.

[lorri24601]

totally agree with ethanryan, my daughter used to wake loads of times till she was way over 2, then i did same and just offered water, no chat ,no getting out of bed,just offer water take it away as soon as she rejected it laid her back down a very quick reassuring rub on her back and said night night. probably took less than 2 weeks for her to realise thats all that was on offer and learn to settle herself back off to sleep unaided, give it a go, good luck, it seems tough at the time but its worth it , you will both benefit :-)

[aims1202]

I dont think she needs medication,
It will take a few days even a week maybe for her to accept only water to drink when she wakes but its important to keep going however upset she is. Just a little cuddle and tell her you'll come back in if she stays in bed, keep going back in straight away at first then make it a bit longer each time before coming back. If she gets up just take her back to bed and stay calm.
Try to avoid sugary drinks a few hours before bedtime. If she's hyper it could be because of sugary drinks or additives in them so best not give them at all. Try just milk or water or pure fruit juice.
Also make sure she is falling asleep on her own so when she wakes in the night she is able to settle herself back to sleep.
Have a nice bedtime routine as well, make her bed a lovely place to be and avoid putting her in her room for unwanted behaviour.
There is nothing wrong with her so dont worry, its just that she has learnt this behaviour works. Good luck!

[hussy]

thanks everybody for your advice x only problem is i give her water and she throws bottle at wall and goes in a right state until i get her milk or sugar free water! she has a wicked temper and lashes out or trashes the room till she gets what she wants. the reason i mentioned medication is because she is very hyper all day and gets very aggressive when she don't get her own way. her dad has got her in this habit with the bottle,, have older child and they are so different, never had any of these problems.

[meltoadhall]

she's 2 and you are the parent, just take the drink away and put her back to bed, and yes she will scream becasue you have taught her that screaming works,it is a long haul and may take several weeks but you need to persevere or this toddler will become a monster who will rule your life.

if she trashes her room take out all the breakables, do you go to toddler groups, swimming outings etc.. to wear her out? is she sleeping in the day?
she has to realise now that tantrums and temper wil not get her own way - be strong and get her father involved too, be consistent in the way you both act and one day it will all be a bad memory.

[confused79]

ethanryan when you say pop do you mean squash not fizzy pop??? i never would give a 2 year old or even my 6 year old pop. that makes them so hyper.

[confused79]

agree with meltoadhallalthough i do know how hard it is beleive me, my step son is almost 3 and i have been in his life since he was 13 months, he became very aggresive and haivng tantrums, he used to have a bottle to bed, everything, he now have no bottle atall have a drink AFTER his dinner then one more WATER then goes to bed with nothing is now both dry in day and night, when we started trying all of this was so hard and he tried to dictate everything, but when he learnt it got him no where just the naught mat he began to stop gradually. Its all a learning curve an yes its stressful but you have to try your best to stick with it and teach her your the parent and in control.

[VillageVicar]

From a holistic approach you may find that placing some ambient sounds in her room can help. An air purifier, or something similar has an amazing affect on little people who have single focus. It helps them focus on other things other than the natural wants as well as the fact they are making you respond.

Just in passing, I noticed you mentioned 'sugar-free' water. Are you possibly referring to anything containing an artificial sweetner? Please, by NO means give your child anything that contains aspartaime or saccahrin. Besides being known carcinogenics, they can promote hyperactivity in young people.

I wish you the best of luck
Fr. Bill

[hussy]

evening all! thanks very much for the great response with the problems that i have with my little terrorist!!! will have to be strong now and try and break this pattern but firstly tell all the neighbours what i am doing or social services will be hammering down my door!!!!! realy gets myself and my partner down and worse for him as he cant just go back to sleep again where i can nod of in secs. been scared to take her nursery as she lashes out when dont get own way and she is very strong! example: there is not a week that goes by when my 10 yr old is crying in pain.... once she smacked her over the head with a bit of wood and cut all her head, just because she didnt like the older one lying next to me on sete!!!! dont know why she doesnt get dog tired she doesnt like being in buggy and walks everywhere if only i had quarter of her energy. although shes very violent on the other hand she is so loving and very affecionate...... split personality already????

[william c]

You need to leave her to scream she probably will only go on for about a half hour and make sure that you warn the neighbours, in case they call the police or social services. Everytime she wakes you go to her so she gets what she wants. I had this problem with second child and we left her to scream although it was quite distressing to us. Also there was one night when she carried on for about an hour and when we went up she had her leg trapped in her cot side, felt a bit bad about that. We also made sure that she had a good night time routine. A long cuddle up with mum and dad on the settee watching tele, bath then into bed and read a story. Please dont resort to medication when she is only 2.

[hussy]

suppose if i was going to then would have done it long ago!! if my first was like this then would never have had another although love her dearly. very clever indeed so plays a good game and is always the winner. just so frustrated she is very demanding and sometimes feel my life is completely taken over but again would be lost without her. need a balance William C badly.......

[jh004j7891]

I have five children 10, 8, 6, 2 & 8 months and yes it is bloody hard work but also the best thing i have ever done

My second son is hyperactive and oh my ***** did I have fun with him The toddler now 2 wow is he a ****** but i always stick to what i say no means no!! and yes that does mean the occaisional temper tamtrum but as they realize that you stick by what you say and follow through they will get less and less

P.S. speak to your health visitor i did went on a parenting course it was the best decision i ever made helps loads to know that your not on your own

GOOD LUCK & try not to medicate does you or the child no favours.

[william c]

I can tell you that the daughter who was like this is now 19 years old and absolutely brilliant. She still knows her own mind and has learnt to "get around us" using other methods like frequently saying sorry, stroking our heads when we are sitting, cuddling up and frequently telling us she loves us. She is very beautiful, turning heads in the street, she looks immaculate whatever she is doing and her room is a total cesspit. Can't seem to get her to keep that tidy but every now and again we go in there, wearing sugeons masks with a spade, that seems to do the trick. She had passed her driving test and 17 1/2 years and was very academic at school, maths and chemistry being her subjects.

[william c]

By the way we use the spade to shovel up all the stuff thats on the floor not to beat her up!

[hussy]

didn't think that for 1 minute you sound a very proud father but how long does it take!!!!!!!!!!