love

[nurse1967]

I'm in love with a man who lives in south africa, he can't live here and I can't live there....what shall I do ??

[ChocolatChip]

Why can't either you live in either place?
Mine was a little less, but I fell in love with someone over the internet who lived 200 miles away. Everyone around us said it would never work or last. And now we have been together a year and have been living together for 2 months.
Long distance relationships are pretty heart-breaking, but do work.
Would you be able to cope without seeing him for months at a time?
If there is no way of you being together then you'll just have to let it go, you can't spend your life seeing someone every couple of months for the rest of your life. As I'd imagine you'd want to settle down and have kids.

[nurse1967]

Dear chocolatchip
thanks for the reply
children doesn't come into it as we are both 40 and family grown up now. He has his business there and I am carer of my mother. I am going out to SA in 8 days time for 3 weeks and I know that it will kill me when I return having to leave him. This has been going on since 1994 and I can't love anyone else as I know I would be settling for second best. Why does love have to be so complicated.

[ChocolatChip]

Aww that's such a shame, and yes, terribly complicated!
The only thing I can think of is just having to wait. It would be way too much of an upheaval to move your mother to SA. Is there no chance of him being able to move his business here?
I hope you enjoy your stay in SA, and I hope you'll be okay leaving him to come home.