Worst excuse to get off work

[Wix]

This morning, the boss had a phonecall from somebody to say he was not going to be coming into work today. According to the boss his excuse was:
"Some idiots sold my car on ebay"
Whats the stupidest excuse you've ever heard?

[Wix]

And just to add, he did get off work but the boss isn't very happy and it looks as if we'll be one staffdown tomorrow.

[Reverandfunk]

Someone could in theory sell your car on ebay but its not like if someone did it as a joke you still have to sell it to them lol

"the dogs stiches have split" - that was actually a line I got off a bird I had arranged to meet lol

[paulos66]

One bloke I knew had a week off after a sesame seed got stuck in his teeth - absolutely true as well

[mccfluff]

i was skinny dipping last night and lost my glasses in the pool, until i find them i can't see'

errrrr actually true and used by me!

my boss was not happym i have no idea how i kept that job

[4getmenot]

well someones rang in today to say he wont be as his mum is ill. Thing is his brother came in

[China Doll]

I used to work for a bookies a while ago and was quite friendly with the area supervisor and manager. I phoned him at 8am one morning to tell him I wasn't coming in, he asked why and I found myself saying, '***, I could lie to you but I respect you too much, lets just say it's cold outside, warm in here and I have a hangover.'

He said the only reason he let me off was because at least I was honest.

[Wix]

Good point Rev, but this guy is well know around the workplace for causing trouble.

"My car has got negative energy, I can�t use it."
Thats another one of his creations.

[4getmenot]

Did have one chap leave a msg on machine saying he couldn�t come in as he couldn�t sit down as he had 3rd degree burns across his @rse. I chuckled to myself as I was there when he did it.

[squarebear]

A lad I know once phoned in to say that it was foggy during the night and he had left his window open. The fog had come in and so he couldn't find his work boots.

His boss let him have the day off.

[Reverandfunk]

Sounds like he needs a good slap lol

[Wix]

Good excuses everyone.

[Pippa68]

Have you ever tried telling people you have no R&B, Rev?

lol x

[Reverandfunk]

All the time Pip all the time.

If young girls approach me for it I know I can get away with saying "I'm not playing any because its rubbish"

The nitemares are the 30 & 40 somethings who will ask you to put some on when theres 20 mins left and everyone is in a party mood or someone the other week who said can you play Fall out Boy as the last song. needless to say I didnt lol

[Wix]

One guy got the day off for saying he had got stuck in the toilet seat. Strange but true.

[Reverandfunk]

When someone says they are having the day off because:

"the voices in my head told me to stay at home and polish my guns" is when it's time to worry

[Hellyon]

"The boat got lost in the fog and we ended up at the wrong end of the docks"
Was a reason, and an absolutely true reason too, for my being three hours late for work one day.

[funnygirl]

We have a girl here, who must have used every excuse under the sun.
Examples are;
'I've got no hot water'
'I've locked myself out'
'I can't find my travel card'
'My car won't start' and she lives yards from a station!!!
'My cat is sick!'
'My heel came of my shoe!'

[cockroach]

I lied the normal migrane one...went shopping all day with my Mum & got a phone call from the Director to be told they had made our whole office redundant & if I wanted to come in (If I felt up to it) everyone had gone down the pub. Trust me to miss all the excitment.

[Skreecheeboy]

One of my colleagues at my weekend job came out with a cracker apparently, "I can't come in today coz my hamster committed suicide by jumping in the microwave." one of his mates then phoned in 5 minutes later to say he couldn't come in either coz he was there when the hamster committed suicide and they were both traumatised by the whole business. Both of them were awarded the day off for sheer inventiveness!