I don't think I've ever had a really bad prezzie, but a single, twenty-something friend at work once received a box of biscuits from Secret Santa.
Knowing who was going to be buying her present, and knowing he was likely to get something boring, a couple of the others clubbed together and bought her a chocolate willy from an Ann Summers party.
The following year, I drew her name from the Secret Santa hat. Somehow she found out and begged me, please, whatever I bought, please could it be something other than box of biscuits and a chocolate c__k.
I ended up buying her a pair of those big fluffy slippers in the shape of cockerels' heads and a packet of chocolate digestives - all wrapped up in a large biscuit box! So in the end, she ended up with a box of c__ks and a chocolate biscuit.
We're still friends. She loved it.