ChatterBank2 mins ago
Am I being selfish?
25 Answers
Hi everyone!
Please read my story below. I don't think I'm being selfish but my partner does. Who is right?
My partner bought a car in December and has been complaining that the gears are problematic. He came home from work tonight and said that he wants to book it in for a check before the month-long warranty runs out (on 14th December - Monday). I am in the final year of my nursing degree and am bang in the middle of crucial exams just now (one tomorrow and one on Monday -14th). Anyway, I am currently studying all day (and night sometimes) and am making sacrifices to allow me to do this (i am taking unpaid time off my part time job for example). My partner needs me to follow him in my car to the garage so that he can drop his car off and then get home again (the garage is some distance away). This journey will need to be repeated later on the same day to allow him to collect the car again. I am flamin' mad that he expects me to take at least 2 hours out of my day when I am so busy and have made my own sacrifices to allow me some decent study time. As usual he has left things to the last minute. Normally, I would do anything for him but am I selfish to think this is my time?? He is trying to make me feel bad by saying things like 'I'm sorry this is so inconvenient for you!!!' Well, yes quite frankly it is! But why do I feel so guilty?
Please read my story below. I don't think I'm being selfish but my partner does. Who is right?
My partner bought a car in December and has been complaining that the gears are problematic. He came home from work tonight and said that he wants to book it in for a check before the month-long warranty runs out (on 14th December - Monday). I am in the final year of my nursing degree and am bang in the middle of crucial exams just now (one tomorrow and one on Monday -14th). Anyway, I am currently studying all day (and night sometimes) and am making sacrifices to allow me to do this (i am taking unpaid time off my part time job for example). My partner needs me to follow him in my car to the garage so that he can drop his car off and then get home again (the garage is some distance away). This journey will need to be repeated later on the same day to allow him to collect the car again. I am flamin' mad that he expects me to take at least 2 hours out of my day when I am so busy and have made my own sacrifices to allow me some decent study time. As usual he has left things to the last minute. Normally, I would do anything for him but am I selfish to think this is my time?? He is trying to make me feel bad by saying things like 'I'm sorry this is so inconvenient for you!!!' Well, yes quite frankly it is! But why do I feel so guilty?
Answers
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.you can learn a great deal at the last minute, gucciman, I always did. (Forgot it again as soon as I finished the exam, which may not be a good idea in nursing, of course.) He may have expected this of you because you already drive him round a lot, foodluva, in which case you may have just for the first time given him notice that you are not his chauffeur... which sounds like a good move.
Gucciman, I am one of those committed mature students (who everyone hates) who consistently works. However, I always revise extra hard in the run up to exams. I always feel as if I know nothing but always achieve high marks. Hopefully, the same pattern will ensue this time.
P.S I AM taking him to the garage but he has been well warned to be more organised in future!
Thanks to all for their input!
P.S I AM taking him to the garage but he has been well warned to be more organised in future!
Thanks to all for their input!
looks like it has all been decided now but perhaps you could have said 'yes I will drop you but arrange for someone to do the return journey as i need to get into my study'. I dont believe that you can study too much - I am sure you will succeed but at the end of you studies you whatever happens you need to be able to look back and know that you had done all you possibly could. Such a shame that he cannot understand and support you. Dont feel guilty about anything, concentrate on your exams. Good luck.
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