Are stupid parents ever going to learn...

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http://www.orange.co.uk/news/topstories/6582.h tm?linkfrom=hp4&link=ticker_pos_1_link_2&artic le=index

When are parents going to learn, that letting you children out on there own or letting them walk around on their own ANYWHERE is a stupid risk.

Have they not heard about Sarah Payne, Jessica Chapman, Hollie Wells, Jamie Bulger, Madeline McCann...the list goes on.

What is up with these people?????

[LoftyLottie]

Oh Loosehead how true. The only thing that is different, as which to be honest, does worry me is the vast increase in traffic from when I was young. But children have to learn how to cope. These coddled children are in fact not going to benefit. They have to learn to be independent and parents are not doing their children any favours by protecting them too much. They need to be introduced to independence gradually.

I would not walk myself through a wooded area and would tell my child to walk the safe way even if it meant an extra mile.

[LoftyLottie]

There are no more bad people abducting children around than there ever has been. We just hear about it a lot more. We need to get things into perspective. I certainly think that most nine year olds that have been taught wisely and have responsible intelligent parents can cope very well and have their heads screwed on.

The parents, as someone has said on here, were under the impression that the child was staying with a friend for the night. The only thing here I would say is that I would always phone the parents if my children had told me that to find out if this was OK with them to reassure myself .

I still think people jump to conclusions and certainly don't think at this stage that these parents should be blamed or put in the same category as the McCanns who left three babes alone in an apartment with an open door.

[Supernick]

I dont believe that the world has got much more dangerous than when i used to walk to shcool 20 years ago. From age 9 I used to walk the mile or so to school and back with my 7 year old brother. By age 11 I was using public transport to go the 10 miles or so to my senior school, and I'm glad.
At the weekend my brother and I would disappear all day to the playing fields in our town and kick a ball around, or take our bikes out along the canal, and we only knew that we were to be back by dark.
There are dangers out there, but they are of a minimal nature, whereas the effect of mollycoddling your kids their whole lives are quite a lot more likely to occur.

[Le Chat]

I used to walk to school at the age of 6yrs! (now 43) My eldest son has just walked alone into town at the age of 11 1/2 for the first time! My fear is of traffic though, not of abduction. The roads are 100 times busier than when I were I lass!
However, I would not be happy to let him go out in the dark at this age, reagrdless of traffic.

[FKNelectro]

if parents were to keep their children wrapped up in cotton wool until they were teenagers or anything, naturally they are going to rebel, its what teenages do right? and that would make them want to do anything you tell them not to. I think that teens should be given a certain amount of resposability to care for themselves, or otherwise, when they become adults, they would find themselves unable to cope

[LoftyLottie]

I must admit LeChat that traffic would be my worse fear, and as much as I think a nine year old is OK walking to school without a parent, if it involved crossing major roads with no pelican crossings it would make me nervous. But I still think that the majority of 9 year olds have a lot more savvy than most people give them credit for (unless they have been mollycoddled).

I don't think there is a definate age when children are OK to have some freedom - it depends on the child, the circumstances and the location. However, I still think that parents are making a rod for their children's backs if they are overcautious and too frightened to let them grow up.

[keyplus90]

I used to work on a video rental shop. One boy about 10 years old used to come there but couple of times I caught him stealing sweets so told him not to come back in the shop again. We used to close shop at 11 PM. couple of I saw him hanging around in freezing cold. I asked him what was he doing there at that time and he said whenever her mother's boy friend comes to see her, she sends him out and orders not to come back until boy friend had left after doing what he was there for. So that poor boy could not go home as long as His mum's boy friend's car was parked outside even if it is mid-night in freezing cold. Any way I allowed him to come and sit in the shop. Now in this case I would blame his mother.

But in general I think the punishment for these crimes (child abuse) is not enough to make people think twice before they abduct and kill someone's child. And that is the main reason. Otherwise parents can not tie themselves with the kids all the times. Yes kids as young as upto 16, should not be hanging around outside without any good reason.

[keyplus90]

I agree with Le chat on Traffic issue. My 12 years old Son has just started walking to school own his own very recently. One thing I told him not to trust Green man and red light for traffics. Always look around as well. I have started seeing more and more people going through the red light. I read in newspaper recently that they are thinking to get rid of a lot of things (as they did in Holland) to force people to start using their senses as well, and not to rely on traffic light to much.

[123everton]

Things have'nt really changed much, when I was 13 I had to be in by 2130, why? Because it was'nt safe.
I was always met from Primary School, and like the others I don't know the distances involved and hope the child is safe and well.
The responsibilty for her imperilment lies with whoever took her, if that's what's happened.
I remember years ago a girl no more than 3 nearly walked under my bus I beeped my horn to warn her, the mother gave me the height of abuse and said the kid had "good road sense", only today some skanky looking mother let her child wander in front of a car to cross the road, I often see "mums"(?) in their pyjamas putting mere babies on the bus to get to school, such people don't deserve a child's love.
All one can do is pray.

[derekpara]

Keyplus, you refer to child abuse by abductors. In my opinion the parents in this case are themselves guily of child abuse, simply by their neglect. They should have checked to make sure she had reached the home of her friend .
I would want to know where my child of that age was every minute they were out of my sight. And why wait that length of time before notifying the police ? More negligence/child abuse.

These parents should be sterilised immediately.

[123everton]

A bit harsh that Derek.
I still don't know the full details, I'm sure right now they don't need reminding of their failings. My concern is purely that (hopefully) somewhere is a very frightened little girl wanting to go home, the alternative does'nt bear thinking about.
Children do need space to grow you have to give them ever increasing amounts of responsibility in order for them to mature effectively.
I see alot of it when the schools kick out, the child gets on the bus no sooner have they sat down mum's phoning them (talking teenagers here) I'd of hated that as a child, you do need that time off-line every now and again. This kid could be very responsible and like alot of children thrive on responsibility the distance may be no further than the local shops. Whoever took her is to blame.

[daffy654]

There is now a thought the child might have run away from home as her 11 year old brother did recently. What could be going on in their home that makes such young children want to run away?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/west_yorksh ire/7255732.stm

[Supernick]

I once tried running away when I was about 14 leaving a horribly angsty letter to my parents about how I 'hated' them and how they never let me do what I wanted. Needless to say, they were excellent adoring parents, and I was being a little sh1t. You can't assume that they have an unhappy home.....

[esquire_19]

As a parent you are ultimately responsible for what happens to your children, letting a nine year old wander free at 7:30pm by themselve is purely irresponsble especially in winter. Questions should be asked why his brother tried to run away on multiple occasions previously. I hope the young girls okay as she's not too late to save from this unbreakable cycle of irresponsible parenting.
Social services should get involved!!! open and shut case

[toby99]

I agree totally spaced. I would never let a nine year old girl walk anywhere alone. They apparently didn't call the police until 7:00 after she didn't return home from school. A neighbour said this morning that she was not the type of girl to run away and she always grassed on her brother when he tried to run away - what did that mean?!!