Guys, is he interested or not?

[sssg4]

I met a guy out a few months ago and we exchanged e-mail addresses. After a short while we exchanged numbers. I have been really busy with work and studying so far this year so, despite several attempts to get me out, we only managed to hook up a couple of wks back. We only spent an hour and a half together over a drink, but I really enjoyed his company and walked away hoping we'd meet up again. We exchanged a text that night and he gave me the impression he'd be asking me out again. He did eventually ask me out on a second date and we met up at the weekend. I had a really good time. We spent about 5hrs together and both had a few drinks. However, there was no physical contact between us. I wasn't expecting it but it just felt right but it didn't happen. He is very much a gentleman but did seem a bit shy. He text to make sure I got home ok, to which I replied and mentioned I'd enjoyed his company. He then text the following day asking how I was feeling etc and we exchanged a couple of texts but he didn't mention having a good night. That was Sat and I haven't heard anymore. Does this guy like me or not as I am totally baffled and haven't met anyone I like this much for a while! Also, he has a lot of female friends, is this a good thing?

[unhappychick]

Ask him!

[andy-hughes]

If he is shy, he may take your perceived reluctance to see him as an indication that you are not very interested in seeing him again.

Why not text him and invite him out? If he refuses in a believable way - busy, what ever - try again in a week or so.
If you get no joy, then he is not interested, but everyone's dignity is intact.

[5033sash]

I would ask him straight out. I have been in a similar situation and kept hoping and praying that he wasn't messing me about and turned out he just wanted to be friends which disappointed me very much, as i wanted more so in the end i just cut the strings. So my opinion would be to just ask him in a gentle way or be like me and just come out with it, not that it was that, that put him off just give it a try. My best wishes to you. I hope this helps in some way

[China Doll]

Well if he's shy and you've been distracted then he might not have perceived any interest on your part and is reluctant to push things further.

If you like him that much then you should just ask him straight out. If that's too scary then suggest another meet up an see how that goes but you may have to take the initiative. It's much better to know these things sooner rather than later.

[sssg4]

Well I was reluctant up until the point me actually met so surely that counts for something! I think I have made iot clear I like him by agreeing to a second date, spending more than a few hours with him and replying to his texts in a friendly way! What else do I need to do, other than ask straight out, which isn't in my nature?

[EmEd1984]

if you made it clear you liked him by agreeing to a second date, surely he made it clearer by asking you in the first place :)

ask him out this time, see what happens then!

[sssg4]

haha I see your point but am a bit of a traditionalist and like a man to pursue me - I guess I've always thought that's how men like it to be too. The other point I forgot to mention is that he is actually moving in the next few weeks, something he knew before setting up the second date so why he would want to see me again I don't know!

[andy-hughes]

heard the phrase 'Men Are From Mars, Woemn Are From Venus'?

Guess what - it's true!

As a man, trust me, he will not see you spending time with him as an invitation to carry on seeing you - we men are not that subtle. He may think you want to be friends, and he is simply too shy to try and move matters along.

If you want him to kiss you, you need to show him. When you are together, stand in front of him, look him straight in the eys, open your lips slightly, and move yourhead towards him slowly. He will get that message, and if he doesn;t respond, you know where you are.

Re. the 'time spent' bit - I spent some time in an e-mail rlationship, and met the person concerned, who spen the next nine hours in my company eating the dinner I bought and drinking the whiskies I paid for (not the issue I hasten to add) - before mailing me to say she didn;t find me in any way attractive!

OK fine - but it shows that a lenght of time spent with someone is absolutly no indication of any level of attraction.

[nannon]

Ah if he didnt like he wouldnt have asked twice for the first date and woudnt have asked for the second!
Maybe he doesnt really know that you like him - men dont always get subtle hints!
I think it would be nice if you asked him this time - it has to work both ways! Men liked to be asked out to apparently!!!

[888sally888]

Andy - 9 hours eating & drinking - what a greedy woman LOL!!

[sssg4]

I gave him money for drinks as I was drinking them like water! ;o

I cant bring myself to text a man and ask them out...fear of rejection I guess and I like to know they like me and aren't just meeting me for the hell of it.

[teag1rl]

I think you've received all good advice on here. You should ask him this time. If he rejects you-so what? go back to the drawing board knowing you tried. If he accepts though it could lead to something else. By sitting here being traditional you could be letting 'the one' get away!

[andy-hughes]

You really have nothing to loose.

As a man, I am used to reection - no-one dies!

If you don't take things a little further, you are never going to know ...

[alijangra]

Maybe as he has a lot of platonic female friends he is used to being in female company other than in a romantic situation so he might just not be so good at reading the signals from you that you are interested. You should just take the initiative and make sure he knows!

[andrea81]

By the looks, he's been doing most of the asking out! Maybe he thinks you're not interested!

[sssg4]

Its hard as I understand where you are all coming from but surely if I told him I enjoyed his company and replied to his texts the following day, it's obvious I like him??? Maybe I am being stupid...I am not so used to dating after a series of long term relationships ;o