When I'm gone

[bigmamma]

Hello friends , how many of you have elderly relatives and can tell me if this is normal for my step fathers age.
I find that over the last couple of weeks he seems to use this " When I 've gone " way of thinking . He has always been very positive about life , and looked to the future , but that spark seems to have gone. He is concerned that his granchildren are so far way , and everything he buys he says the guarentee will see him out. He is telling us all what , in his house , he wants us to have , special individual something for each of us , and says we can decide on the rest . It upsets me to hear him talk about this but , am I being silly , do all elderly people talk about the end ? He is 84 , and I love him dearly , bless him .

[~max~]

Unfortunately, I wasn't there when my paternal grand parents passed away. I went there aged 17 when my grandad died, only to find my grand mother in a bed, unable to move, and about 100 lbs thinner...It was a BIG shock. My grandma had always been big, VERY big, and there she was....looking like a little girl on her bed. She cried when she saw me, and so did I, obviously, as it had been so long ( about 5 years). The first thing she told me was, "look, I've lost my boobs"...And that made me cry even more!!! She was an old-school woman, you see, and at the time she married, it was great to be overweight. She was always telling me that I took after her, and that the boys would be queing up to marry me...lol Bless!!!
The only time I REALLY felt beautiful, was when my grandma, on her bed, told me she was proud of me, and she forgave my mother. I will always love her for that.

[bigmamma]

Hi weeal , and max , awww , that must have been hard to see your nan smaller and older than you had before , age doesn't treat the body well . xxxxxxxx

[harryshaw]

lv ya mamma

he.s just looking out for your welfare in life

to make sure all of you are ok its the norm

lv to porche and you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

monty xxxxx

[ELVIS68]

Awww Max, I was welling up reading that

[Drisgirl]

I am not being flippant BM -I am 49 and I say that -I have just revised my will and I now know I am not invincible -my kids are fine with it -they will miss me as and when -but we all go so -maybe we are hardened to it to an extent but it doesnt bother me in the slightest.I have discussed things for when I am gone and we can speak quite freely about it.

Suppose its distressing to hear someone saying that -far rather that than bu��er all -without the oppo to say all the things you want to say -well thats my take on it anyway. xxx

[snow.maiden]

Hi bigmamma!
From what I've heard in similar situations, people reach a certain age, and then realise that they MIGHT not have much longer to go. It's upsetting for those closest to hear it, but it's best to be practical about the material things left behind, and get that sorted. Then your step father can hopefully enjoy a few more years, knowing that things've been sorted out. xx