Totally agree Jenna- my daughter lost her twon boys when she was 21 weeks gone, and whilst they obviously weren't full term, believe me the pain of losing them was no less.
Nothing you can say to your secretary (wow, really you've got a secretary? Well I'm impressed!) to ease he pain, her sister will have ot 'ride it out'. It does ease with time, but it doesn't go away.
My cousin had to have a termination at 32 weeks when it was discovered very late that her baby had no kidneys or liver. She has since had another baby but I didn't know what to say so I stayed away. It was mostly difficult as I had just had a baby myself when this happened and I didn;t want her to feel uncomfortable.
2 weeks ago my nan died, and I have been lost not knowing how to get over it. Of course I know the sad feeling will end or at least dull but then I feel guilty waiting for that day as she meant so much to me. The one thing my nan dying has done is made me appreciate those I love around me, at the funeral I went and hugged my cousin and apologised from the bottom of my heart that I hadn't been there for her, or said nothing etc I hope I never lose sight of those who mean a lot to me.
I have a 3 year old niece and my sis is expecting another little girl. My niece is my family's world and if I ever hear anything happening to kids on the news it makes my heart break because I couldn't begin to imagine how any of us, especially my sister, would cope if something happened to my niece
Saying that I do wonder what sort of world she is going to grow up in! Life is scary!
Very sad when this happens Jenna, maybe it was for a reason, but that will not take the pain away, life is so short, so precious,
When I think how quickly the years go by, in the blinking of an eye another year has passed, enjoy today as if it is your last, so look after the ones you love and do the things you want to do, No regrets. Live, Love,Laugh and be honest.
It's just such an awful thing, I just can't imagine having to go through that, it happened to my godmother's daughter at 7 months as well. So so sad.
My nan dying really had an effect on me, I was with her cuddling her when she passed.
So many of us had lost touch and since she died we've all become so much closer and stayed in touch more and get to see each other.
It's made me realise so much more what family is about as most of the connections were through nan as she was such a special person and when she passed away I made sure that connections weren't lost again.
Aww my secretary is such a lovely person Boo, just a lovely person to have around, I feel for her and her family so badly.
What has made me think about life recently is the fact that my friend, who is only in her early forties, has a rare degenerative brain disease and no longer recognises her children (aged 8 and 11) as belonging to her. She has no concept of appropriate behaviour and has become very much like a child herself. She isn't able to care for herself any longer and has a life expectancy of about 2 years.
Seeing my friend deteriorate rapidly and her whole family suffering like this sure helps put life into perspective.
Oh that must have been awful for the poor lady, Jenna!
One of my friends lost her baby at full term, due to her then (violent) boyfriend pushing her down the stairs. I can't even begin to imagine what she went through.
She is now pregnant again, after being told at the time that she wouldn't be able to have any more children! :O)
Goodsie, I didn't know about your bereavement hun, my condolences. xxx
I used to hear some awful stories when I volunteered at a local hospice.
A friend's friend passed away a few weeks ago after having a brain hemorrage out of the blue, only 50 and leaving 2 young children behind, heartbreaking.
A friend of mine died of a brain haemorrhage at the age of 32. I was informed of his death by an ex girlfriend of his whilst on the way to work. Talk about tactless! By the time I got there, I was in such a state, they had to send me home.
I can't imagine what losing a child must be like. I just hope they can come to terms with the loss and try again. You sometimes read of this happening because they can't carry one sex of child to full term. It seems more common not to be able to have boys for some reason.
That is really tragic Jenna - it is difficult to know what to say in those circumstances.
I think that when it happens the other way round - a young child or baby losing a parent, it breaks my heart as well. My young nephew was 6 when he lost his Dad and 2 of his 3 grandparents in a short space of time. At his Nanna's funeral, he said " First my Pappa, then my Daddy and now Nanna, soon I wont have anybody left to love me"
Naturally, we all assured him that that wasn't the case - we have a large family and plenty of people to love him, And we all intended to live for a very long time...
He is almost 11 now, and it still breaks my heart to see him and his little sister without the Daddy that loved them so much.
My brothers best friend, (who used to be his teacher, and he now teaches along side!) had 2 sons. When his first son was 21, he died in a canoeing accident, got stuck upsde down and drowned.
2 years later it was my 18th birthday party at my dads, and I had a call from my brother to say that he couldnt make it, as the mans 2nd son, aged 21 at the time, had been hit by a car on a night out with friends and killed.
He only had 2 kids, both died within 2 years of eachother, both 21 at the time.
I had met the man a couple of times myself when I was younger, and just cant ever begin to imagine in the slightest what he has been through.
when my son escaped from his school and ran across a dual carriageway, he was found by an off duty policeman. he is very vunerable and the thought of what could have happened has rocked me to my core