Boyfriend crap!!!!

[Leapers]

Hi everyone
just wanted to have a moan really and maybe get a few suggestions please....
Me and my boyfriend have been together for a few months now but were previously very close friends for 3years when we finally got together thighs started off great and it was lovely. we both are not really into all the usual date type stuff like dinner or cinema we just like to walk somewhere nice and talk, we also most of the time ended up eating ice-cream together. as we are at the same college we saw each other nealry everyday and went out just the two of us at weekends as we both have quite a large collection of friends.
well anyway now things have changed quite alot we no longer go out anywhere and we seem to be keeping our groups of friends seperate at college so dont see each other then so much either and he used to phone me or i'd phone him nearly every night but not anymore,

I was going to the hairdressers last week and bumped into him in town with his friends and he left them to walk me to get my hair cut and said we really needed to talk, i thought he meant it was time to split but he didnt he jsut meant more becasue we hardly spend any time together but that was the end of that. then i saw him the other day at college and he said his mums friend has just got married to a japanese woman who already has two kids and they're moving over to the uk, he has apparently been 'FORCED' into showing one of the daughters around our area and shes really hot but obviously he said he was going to find it hard not to flirt with her.

[Leapers]

I got really pi$$ed at him becasue to be honest i'd rather he hadn't told me as i get paranoid really easy. but why is he still with me when we dont see each other or talk much. i thought he just wanted to be able to say he has a girlfriend or whatever but if it goes well with the japanese girl then he's going to probably dump me anyway.
We have already established between ourselves that im a b!tch and hes an ar$e
what should i do as i dont want to split and i have made effort to try and meet up and tried ringing him but theres never an answer he just seems to like the status even if it doesnt mean anything. Sorry it so long

[razmataz]

Hi Leapers,
That wasn't the best plan for your boyfriend to tell you that he was going to find it hard not to flirt with this girl, especially as he knows you're insecure.
Although it probably is not what you want to hear, I'd say he's holding on to you simply because he doesn't have the courage to end it, or maybe even stringing you along i.e.e keeping hold of you 'just in case'. The fact that you suspect he will go off with someone else you consider 'better' than you is either related to your insecurity, or because the evidence points to it. The fact that he tells you he wants to meet up with you more often and then proceeds to do nothing about it leads me to think that your suspicions of him may have some weight.
What is the nature of your 'pursuit' of him? Do you try to make contact with him regulary and fail? Talk to this guy and try to establish what's in his head.

[teag1rl]

I'd go with your gut feeling and walk away from this. Sounds miserable.

[terambulan]

Text him......say ur cousin is over from Oz and he's a 'hot surfy guy' who wants u to show him around; so you'll be out of circulation for a while!

Should be a good response from boyfriend!

[Leapers]

Thanks for all the answers! i think i will end it but am quite nervous
any ideas or advice as would like to stay friends

[beso]

Glad you can see it is time to get out. I think he knows this too.

Just stop trying to make contact. Remember If he does invite you out sometime it will only be becuase he hasn't got a better offer. Just cheerfully say thanks but no thanks. You don't have to make excuses.

Most people in this situation will often try emotional blackmail but don't buy into it. Keep smiling.