Should I keep trying to contact her?

[tigwig]

An old work colleague of mine who used to be a very good friend has had her first baby about 6 weeks ago. We always stayed in touch by phone but haven't seen each other since before she was pregnant. As soon as she told me about the baby I bought her a little pressie and have attempted 3 times to suggest we meet up so we can catch up. She had a really difficult birth and has been infected so she has had to keep going for hospital visits which clashed with when we were going to meet. I last spoke to her over a week ago and she sounded fine but I have texted her 3 times now to see if I can call round and she has not got back to me (this has been for 4 days now). Should I keep trying or just wait for her to make the next move? I don't want to hassle her but I don't think its unreasonable to meet up and wonder if she is suffering with post natal depression a bit. What do others think?

[Eve]

She may well just be overwhelmed by the jobs and knackeredness of new motherhood and she has a new little person ruling her world leaving little room for anyone else.

I'd let her get back to you for say the next week then maybe try again.

[Ethel]

She's almost certainly overwhelmed.

I suggest you drop her a little card telling her that you are ready to meet up whenever it suits her. Suggest a few dates, and see what happens.

[bednobs]

hmm, recently, my phone was off for a week when the battery went bananas. Also when people text me, i always take time to get back, and i don't have a baby or pnd!

[topogigo]

If you present yourself at the door, it could be a bad moment for your friend and it may be uncomfortable. Don't text, call, you will gauge her reaction in a call and know perhaps she isn't up for company. Or send a card, it is obviously important to you, so tell her that. She may be waiting for a little bit of attention for herself and not so much for the baby.

[Octavius]

I wouldn't barge in assuming that she has post natal depression either. Some women can be in shock for weeks after giving birth (it can be quite taumatic for some, even if its a short labour), some can be all of a tizzy with hormones and general aftermath of a life changing experience, and some can just be overwhelmed by the responsibility and the demanding nature of a young baby.

She will have been up all hours of the night, run ragged during the day, and without much rest to switch off. So whatever time you ring or text, its likely to be a 'bad time'. At least until about 12 weeks.

[helliebobs]

Don't forget she will also be overwhelmed with other visitors as well, her phone probably never stops beeping with people textng her and wishing her well.
I'd send a little text and tell her to give you a ring when things have quietened down and she and the new arrival have settled in.
As Octavius said, don't assume she has PND either, she's just adjusting!