Employment laws on sickness absence

[dot.hawkes]

Hi guys, i have spent a while trying to find info for my daughter online and tried ringing acas and the cab but cannot get through. my daughter has been on long tern absence covered by 4 weekly doctors notes, each time she goes to her GP and answers his questions and chats away to him he gives her another 4 weeks off work with depression. She originally was signed off for 4 weeks for bereavement depression after losing 4 friends last year, the GP has referred her to a counsellor , it took 12 weeks to get the woman to visit my daughter at home and it lasted half an hour and now there is a long wait for a course of visits. My daughter is definately not the girl she was and spends alot of time at home doing very little and then she will get all energetic and go on long walks, I mean of 5 miles or more! Now her company, who have not paid her above SSP for 3 months, have sent her a letter asking for a meeting either at home or in a store 40 miles away. My daughter's GP has sent them a report 8th April. my daughter would need to use 2 buses and a train both ways to get to the store and she is paranoid on public transport she says, which isn't normal for her as she used the train every work day for 4 years. As i say, i have looked for info as to whether the firm can put this pressure on her, let alone meet at her house , I think she feels abit harrassed. Does anyone have advice or a link to a site i am not finding please? Dotty xxxx

[Doc_Spock]

Hi Dotty. I have mixed feelings about these situations.

Reading between the lines it appears your daughter is unfit for work and may be for some time.

Would it be fairer all round is she resigned.

[RevFunk]

She wants to get a grip. Paranoid on public transport oh dear....

We all have to deal with tradegies in life, yeah sit and home and mope all day then start grizzling when the company that is paying you for doing nothing wants to do something about it.

[shaking]

Sounds like the company are going to dismiss her.

[DrFilth]

dot sorry to hear about your daughter depression is not something you can put a time limit on ie 6 weeks 6 months if the firm want to see her i think it would be best at your home with you present . that way you can answer some of the questions that they might ask and will remove some of the pressure she will face.is she ok with the medication that she has and has she any hobbies that you can get her interested in .if she has to go back in work to be seen by the personnel department please go with her.

[dot.hawkes]

I won't take offence at your comments, but she lost her best friend, a 27 year old girl who had just qualified as a mid wife, had just bought her own place and had an brain anurisam(sp) one sunday whilst decorating it, that was New Year 2007, then 3 months later a 19 year old lad died in an accident, he was one of her group, then a month later an ex boyfriend died suddenly, and then we all lost my son's godfather in a motorbike accident, not his fault as proved at the inquest. She was in a management position and never once took any time off work throughout last year except to attend the actual funerals. Come Christmas, after working 50 hour weeks for a month, she suddenlt realised who she would not be seeing at christmas and gave into the depression. She was never a shirker, never a depressed person, she has not given up and each time she goes to the doctor she expects to be signed off for work but he isn;t doing that.

[dot.hawkes]

the doctor was giving her anti-depressents for 8 weeks but then took her off them, at the moment she is not on any medication, he just says to wait for the counselling

[mandimoo]

thats very sad and i hope she gets better soon. as for the job front... is the job so important or exclusive to her that she really needs to worry? i mean if she has the job of her dreams and opportunities rarely arise, yes, fight tooth and nail for her to keep it. but if she is a shop assistant, or warehouseperson there are lots of jobs out there so try not too overworry.

[dot.hawkes]

and they are not paying her she gets SSP, some people can be so fickle and harsh, and no help all at the same time

[DrFilth]

then the best thing is to wait for to see what happens at counselling . they may then put her on some different medication. please be with her if the firm talk to her it will take some of the pressur off. please ignore some of the remarks that have been made.

[Postdog]

Can't help on the problem, but can say that one day, for no apparent reason, your daughter will probably turn the corner and start to get her life back together. She may need to "jolt" herself with something, because depression can be very self destrutive, and it is only by the person realising that something has to change, and making that change, that things start to get better. The good news is that after an experience like that, you can become stronger.

Going back a few years, I was facing the iminent death of my mum - I knew it was on the cards, and soon, but didn't know when. One of my dogs then died, then a month later so did the other one - only dogs I know but part of the family for 15 years. Six weeks after that, my mum DID die, and after the funeral, my sister and her family stopped talking to me - why I don't know. I still had my girlfriend, on and off for 3 years but mainly on, who subsequently moved in with me, but that too ended just a few months later as a result of money problems - in a nutshell she had kids (who weren't living with her) and she threw money she didn't have at them, trying to make them love her more than the dad. Long story short, she got into incredible debt, so much so that unless things changed, my house would be put at risk.

Anyway, she went, so in the space of 4 months, I lost everything that mattered to me and ended up very very depressed for months,

Anti depressants CAN help more than you think, so please suggest she gives them another try, and from there do something else to help buck the downward spiral - join a club, help out somewhere, do anything just to get a bit of self esteem and control back.

[dot.hawkes]

We have the same emploter Zac, we are both managers and I have covered her dept several times since she went off. They have been very patient but I am confused as to where they are going legally by meeting with her at her house, which is my daughters choice of venue. I ust need to know if they are allowed to ask that and if they need her to resign so they can fill the vacancy, will they be able to suggest she does so, that's all, I understand the companies position as regards the business.

[bednobs]

hi, i dont think that the company asking for a meeting with her is them putting pressure on her at all especially as they are willing to come to her house. When i was off work sick, my company asked me for a meeting to see what they way forward for us was, both for the good of myself and the good of the company, and it turned out really helpful in starting me off in finding me a career i could manage within my limitations.
i think you are so worried and concerned about your daughter (rightly so) that you are being blinded into thinking that either the company have bad intentions or that they owe your daughter something more than they are giving her.
From what you say in your post i think you will just have to accept that her mental health prevents her from working at that job, and that this is going to be an enduring problem.
Perhaps she might find work that dosent involve public transport? Or if you are so worried about them coming to your home, take the day off work and drive her there.

[Archburner]

Very moving stories, esp. from Postdog. Very deep!