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criticism from parents
12 Answers
you can never win can you? i mean im not a teen anymore but still get treated like one.....ive had a girlfriend, had a steady job and have been reliable grown up, consistent and hard working but thats not enough. ..i live at home with parents and an old colleague once said that i cant remember what happened yesterday let alone 2 weeks ago. thing is my parents are now saying i c0cc0on myself and daydream alot, and that it wouldnt be good to be that way in a new job. i admit i do have a short attention span and memory but surely other peopl are this way?? some convos i hear are like what did you have at dinner and my head just thinks zzzz boring. i cant help it but i am not the most energetic and incessant chat drains me quite quickly. sometimes i feel my parents have less power over me at my age but that they feel the need to take some back by criticising. i mean im a decent guy and i pay my way yes i might be a bit dizzy but doesnt everyone have flaws? if we didnt life would be dull???
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unfortunately moving out may not solve the problem but means you probably have to put up with their critisisms less often!!
Me and my partner are 23, own our own house and have a 3month old baby together. When my parents in law visit they critisise everything from the socks my partner is wearing, to one plate which hasn't been washed up yet - no I'm not kidding!! They've only recently stopped snooping thru our fridge to check we're eating properly!!
If you're gonna move out, move far away, I wish we had!! failing that, you could try having it out with them, telling them to count their blessings that you're paying your way etc.
Me and my partner are 23, own our own house and have a 3month old baby together. When my parents in law visit they critisise everything from the socks my partner is wearing, to one plate which hasn't been washed up yet - no I'm not kidding!! They've only recently stopped snooping thru our fridge to check we're eating properly!!
If you're gonna move out, move far away, I wish we had!! failing that, you could try having it out with them, telling them to count their blessings that you're paying your way etc.
If it's constructive criticism, mhb, then perhaps your parents are making some valid points, but living on top of each other can have its downside.
Try to motivate yourself to get out a bit more often - even a good walk can clear your head - and give you exercise.
Just sounds to me as though you're bored, and any adverse words from your parents'll come across as criticism if you haven't got any hobby/friends to interest you.
You sound a decent person, but if you allow yourself to get into a rut at your age, it's only going to get worse. It'd also be a good idea to have a word with your doctor. Maybe you've got some undiagnosed condition, like borderline ADHD. this can cause you to have a weak attention span, but there are drugs available to help with this. Best of luck.
Try to motivate yourself to get out a bit more often - even a good walk can clear your head - and give you exercise.
Just sounds to me as though you're bored, and any adverse words from your parents'll come across as criticism if you haven't got any hobby/friends to interest you.
You sound a decent person, but if you allow yourself to get into a rut at your age, it's only going to get worse. It'd also be a good idea to have a word with your doctor. Maybe you've got some undiagnosed condition, like borderline ADHD. this can cause you to have a weak attention span, but there are drugs available to help with this. Best of luck.
thats the thing, hopefully new job and surroundings will be the start of new friendships etc, i was in a rut in my old job but kept telling myself to hang in and things might improve....but am feeling more upbeat now, i do have friends but not many locally anymore....i just feel an idiot sometimes because i know i can come over a bit dizzy but i cant help who i am, it doesnt help you want to push yourself in relationships and in life when people you trust keep reminding you what your bad points are, its not like im a criminal......would women tire of a guy who didnt want to talk forever and has selective hearing???
Some women like outgoing guys, who can talk for England; some prefer quieter, mor thoughtful men. Just be yourself, and don't try and change the way you are, whether it's to please your parents or not.
I'm sure they're OK people, as they seem to've brought you up alright, but as a parent myself, I appreicate the need to keep encouraging and supporting my kids, never to pull them down. It might be dificult for your parents though, as perhaps they have certain expectations of you, which they don't feel're being met. If you can't talk to them and explain how you feel, then write them a letter, saying that although you care for them, they have to give you the space to be the person you are - not the one they hope they created. You can be guided by parents, but you aren't a clone of them.
I'm sure they're OK people, as they seem to've brought you up alright, but as a parent myself, I appreicate the need to keep encouraging and supporting my kids, never to pull them down. It might be dificult for your parents though, as perhaps they have certain expectations of you, which they don't feel're being met. If you can't talk to them and explain how you feel, then write them a letter, saying that although you care for them, they have to give you the space to be the person you are - not the one they hope they created. You can be guided by parents, but you aren't a clone of them.
It sounds like there just giving you constructive critism, just think they only want the for you.
My parents are sometimes critical of me but just depends how you handle it.
Sometimes I see there point and work on it, and sometimes I just tell them to get with the times/they're too old to understand:-).
Make a joke out of it, but at the same time telling them to back off.
We have a great relationship, and you never know the tables maybe turned one day.
My parents are sometimes critical of me but just depends how you handle it.
Sometimes I see there point and work on it, and sometimes I just tell them to get with the times/they're too old to understand:-).
Make a joke out of it, but at the same time telling them to back off.
We have a great relationship, and you never know the tables maybe turned one day.
Just think how nice a place of your own could be, even a bed sit.
Not tidy your room, leave your clothes where they drop, eat what you like, wash up when there's no clean stuff to use,have your friends in or even your parents, live like a pig or be a tidy boy.
Perhaps you have it easy and cheap living at home but one day the parents may be your responsibility. Try to see their point of view.
Good Luck and have a happy life.
Not tidy your room, leave your clothes where they drop, eat what you like, wash up when there's no clean stuff to use,have your friends in or even your parents, live like a pig or be a tidy boy.
Perhaps you have it easy and cheap living at home but one day the parents may be your responsibility. Try to see their point of view.
Good Luck and have a happy life.
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