Dear John Letter part 2

[funnygirl]

Dear Ex-Wife,
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work.
I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was
"You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice.

When you cooked my favourite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I
stopped eating pork seven years ago.

I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica.
But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason I guess.

I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you
wrote, you won't get a xxxx!!! .

Your ex husband.

[buddybird]

absolutely brilliant !!!!!!!!