A Dilemma

[jen78]

I had a facebook message a few weeks ago off a guy I used to know through the church youth group.

We never had much to do with each other as he was older but we went on some similar stuff, both played the guitar and I went on a youth mission to Romania with his older sister. We had one embarrasing teenage phonecall potentially asking each other out but nothing more.

That was round 95-97 and I have seen him once since in about 2001 at his sister's wedding.

He wanted to come to manchester and me to help him dress up for a charity do. Makes me wonder why me after all this time when there are loads of girls he knows back home and he has family here.

I agreed to help which set off a barrage of e.mails and I felt like he was coming on a bit strong. Turns out there is no organised charity thing, just an idea of doing something.

I backed off and he txted me and has now sent another message apologising for coming on too strong but still wanting to meet for the charity dress up thing.

Argh, what do I do??? Still help or back off in case it's still an excuse to see me!!!

[legendis.god]

unless youre worried hes gonna attack you then if hes doing the charity thing then why not?

if youre concerned then i suggest a sudden holiday at the time of said charity event.

or just tell him youre too busy and hope he does well at it.

[jen78]

Part of my worry is, when I was asking about dates for when it was and such, it turns out there is no actual charity event, just an "I may do it for something like Children in Need" kinda thing.

If there was a set thing I'd feel more up for it.

[sn�gged]

'nutter alert' lol... him not you :-)

[haysi06]

Hi jen78 you obviously feel uncomfortable meeting up with this guy so just make your excuse and say 'no'. Otherwise we may be reading about you in the papers.....

[DanFlo]

Fob him off and make out you're on a world round trip hopefully!!

[sara3]

jen.. you know better than this! if you'd like to meet him arrange to meet for a coffee somewhere public.

it's nice that he's keen, but he needs to calm down a bit!

[jen78]

I think I'm going to have to, I don't think he's a nutter or anything but there's just something strange about the whole thing and he was sending me 3/4 messages a day at one point!!!

Think I'll leave well alone and make a polite and very long lasting excuse.

[jen78]

Hey sis :) Us and our men huh!

He was always a lovely guy and I did have a bit of a thing for him...back when I was a teenager!

I am sooo not up for any man at the moment, let alone the nutty mass messaging thing!

[sara3]

you know best.. always trust your instincts x

[legendis.god]

this is the problem with sites like facebook and friends reunited.
anyone who has your name can look you up and get in touch


theres a reason why folk havent heard from folk from school 10 , 20 or whatever many years ago


if you were that bothered you wouldnt have lost touch


so just tell him


thanks but no thanks

[sara3]

the more men I meet, the more attractive our Colin looks!

it's his (unofficial) birthday tomorrow. he'll be 4 :o)

[legendis.god]

Colin?


Sara welll maybe ill send you a raincheque?

Dont wanna be one of the many



lol

[jen78]

Aww bless, hugs to Colin :)

At first I didn't want come across as OTT, almost accusing him of having an ulterior motive but he has as much as confirmed it twice now by apologising for coming on too strong.

Half of me feels bad for not helping, especially if it's a charity thing as he knows I've done a lot of charity and voluntary stuff but the other just screams, run away....fast....

[Aprilis]

Sara3 is right, trust your instincts. You don't feel entirely comfortable with this so, if in doubt....don't do it! You've no reason to feel bad about it. If it doesn't feel right then it isn't.

[sara3]

Leg, Colin is my cat!

jen.. listen to the screaming voice ;o)

g'night baby sis xx

[legendis.god]

Right sara
well im getting the compliments tonight

mrs overall just said urgghh at the thought of me in my kilt at xmas
and mentioned something about chipolatas


cheeky BINT

[jen78]

I will :) night night big sis x

[Ice.Maiden]

Must just add, Jen, that Leggy's right about if friends really want to keep in touch - they usually DO. I'm still in contact with schoolfriends, and any time we've changed addresses, we've always let each other know. Your friend probably remembers you for being good with charity events, so thought you'd like to help him, but if he's doing something for CIN, folk usually get official application forms or whatever for it. Do what you feel's right.

[terambulan]

jen78..........go-on, nothing ventured nothing gained.....and you can tell us all about it.

Don't let the poor desperate bloke down......give him a chance. Am sure you can look after yourself! He's hardly an ogre?