Older woman - younger man not bothered??

[hugoboss]

My mother - who is 52 - has started dating a younger man who is 36. She tells me that he has said he doesnt care how old she is, and in fact doesnt want to know how old she is - so she hasn't told him, even though she's offered on numerous occasions. Now, question is: could this all end in disaster? What if he knows she is older, but perhaps thinks she is, say, 45?? They were having a conversation this week, and he mentioned an 'old woman' of 50 in passing. Now she's scared he's gonna think she's OLD! any advice/comments?!! She she stay quiet on the matter, and enjoy her toy boy, or tell him straight out?!

[HGKinsey]

Age should not be an issue - and he obviously doesn't think she's 52 or he wouldn't have said what he did about the woman who passed by. However, it DOES matter that both parties know the truth about each other. Tell him!!!!!! If he's not worth bothering about then she will soon work that out by his response.

[butter1]

I agree with HGKinsey, I think he should be told.  If two people are inlove then age should definitely not matter.  My boyfriend is 7 years younger and it doesn't matter to me.  If your happy, then that's all what matters in my opinion. 

[FP]

I don't think you should get involved.  It is between your mother and her friend.  I don't mean this unkindly but it is really not your place to intervene and will cause a lot of problems between you and your mother.

Let her enjoy herself.  He will find out eventually and if he is genuinely fond of her the age will not make a difference.

[hugoboss]

FP - I am not intervening. My mother has asked for my advice. With all due respect to you - you don't know what my relationship is like with my mum, so how would you know 'it would cause a lot of problems' with her??!  For your information - she IS enjoying herself. I never said she wasn't.

To everyone else who offered helpful comments: thank you.

[FP]

You asked for comments and I disagreed with the others!  Why ask if you knew already what you wanted the answer to be?  However, I apologise as I read HGKinsley's answer to read that you should tell him. 

[trodgers5]

Your mum must look fantastic for her age.  If I can still pull a 36 year old bloke when i am 52 then fair play.  I wouldnt tell him, but if he finds out later and sticks around then good on him.  If he is not interested after finding out then it is his loss and he wasnt worth it anyway.  I hope your mum enjoys every minute because she sounds fantastic!! You are only as old as you feel.

[Miss Zippy]

If your mum�s chap doesn�t want to know, then why tell him?  Your mum isn�t deceiving him in any way, he�s choosing not to know (presumably he knows your mum has children, which will give him an idea of her age). It�s nice to have a bit of mystery in the early stages of a relationship and if things develop between them and get serious then he�ll find out sooner or later but it won�t matter anyway. It�s not like your mum is keeping a potentially devastating secret from him (e.g. pretending to be single when she is in fact married). Good for your mum, hope it goes well for her!

[hugoboss]

Thanks Trodger and Miss Zippy. Yes, my mum is good looking for her age! Doesn't look a day over 40! I love the fact that she is just enjoying life.