feeling down

[indian]

am feeling abit low at the moment about life, all my friends have men or are getting married, i'm single, not gto a clue what i want to do carrer wise, restricted by family in my general life etc etc, Any idea on how i can get out of this rut?

[Scarlett]

I do sympathise- I get bouts of this- I think everyone does!! What you need is to get togther with a friend and talk everything through. This will get it straight in your mind what you want and what you don't want. Then, make a list of what you REALLY would love, in an ideal world- where you would live, what sort of job (if any) you would love to be doing, what your ideal partner would be like, and VISUALISE it.

Then take one of those things- say, the job. Write out tiny step by step instructions of what you would have to do to get there. Like a ladder, where the top rung is the job. Then, each day, do a little bit towards the next step. This could be things like writing a new CV, getting online and researching suitable companies, making a phone call etc. Do a little bit every day, and soon you will be making headway. But do this with the help of  a friend and they can give you encouragement.

GOOD LUCK!x

[smudge]

I also sympathise with you indian & Scarlett's post is a very useful one.

I'm off into the garage to find a ladder to help me with my current in-a-rut problems! Thank you Scarlett.

[smudge]

Hope you find find your way through it indian & wish you well soon. -x-

[Miss Zippy]

One of the most wise sayings I�ve heard is always to look forward, never sideways.  If you always look sideways at other people and see they have things you would like - whether it�s a happy relationship, fulfilling career, big house or flash car � it is natural this will make you feel down. Always look forward; look at where you want to be in 6 months/ one year/ 5 years� time and put a manageable plan in action to work toward your goals. As Scarlett said, most of us get a bit down about things at some time or another, that�s natural. What is important is not to let a situation or worry take over you. I think you should tackle your job situation first as a fulfilling, enjoyable career can make a big difference to your life and also has the bonus of leading you to make new friends. Do any of your friends or family have jobs that appeal to you who you could talk to for advice on how to get into those jobs?

[smudge]

Very wise words Miss Zippy.

[FP]

Scarlett, what excellent advice.  I am just going out to get the ladder as well!  Perhaps Smudge and I can set up a window cleaning business ;o)

[smudge]

Now that sounds like a good idea FP - we could take turns in climbing the ladder & holding the bucket - lol.

Wouldn't it be nice if we could all meet up for a nice clotted cream tea? :0)

[Scarlett]

Smudge you are so sweet. I would love that! We should.

[FP]

LOL In a Pickle.  Knowing my luck, I would be the one to fall off the top!

[Clare A]

Make sure the ladder is tied, and that someone is footing it at the bottom! (I know H&S says it's unsafe to foot a ladder, but sod them - these are our friends!).

[Clare A]

My last reply sounded very flippant, which wasn't meant. I don't know how old you are, indian, but what's the rush re marriage/partnership? When you're happy with yourself, and aren't looking, you positively glow to other people! And they really notice it. Stop looking, and you'll be surprised!

[indian]

Cheers guys am looking for a job and trying to keep myself motivated mean while otherwise i'll slip into depression (it's a bad habit i have). Any time i start feeling really bad i'll think of that ladder