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Bullying in schools......
18 Answers
Was just listening to Radio 2 & there was a conversation regarding bullying.
One woman said bullying should be dealt as soon as it's brought to the teacher's/parents attention & nipped in the bud.
Another woman said that name calling & jostling is all part of growing up! She also said that bullying can be exaggerated & that children should be left to fend & stick up for themselves.
I'm all for the first option, which was the general opinion - what do you think?
One woman said bullying should be dealt as soon as it's brought to the teacher's/parents attention & nipped in the bud.
Another woman said that name calling & jostling is all part of growing up! She also said that bullying can be exaggerated & that children should be left to fend & stick up for themselves.
I'm all for the first option, which was the general opinion - what do you think?
Answers
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Oooo a toughy!
It depends what they term name calling and jostling? Many kids do this to each other on a daily basis and 10 minutes after they've done it ,they're friends again and it's forgotten. So yes I agree that these sort of 'games' they play should be left, and not make mountains out of molehills etc.
Full scale bullying however should be stamped on immediately.
It depends what they term name calling and jostling? Many kids do this to each other on a daily basis and 10 minutes after they've done it ,they're friends again and it's forgotten. So yes I agree that these sort of 'games' they play should be left, and not make mountains out of molehills etc.
Full scale bullying however should be stamped on immediately.
My son was bullied and the tw@tty parents of this other kid thought they'd start on me outside the school. What chance do kiddies have with parents like that?
Some bullying is harmless playground banter and it's all over in seconds. Kids learn social skills this way I'm sure. Horrific bullying needs to be sorted out.
Some bullying is harmless playground banter and it's all over in seconds. Kids learn social skills this way I'm sure. Horrific bullying needs to be sorted out.
my son was "bullied" in nursery. a larger agressive boy was waiting til no-one was watching and thumping him in the face. at 3 years old my little one was very upset by it all.
a nice chat with the teachers away from the watchful eye of the kids and we decided that the best way was for the children to have a discussion about bullys and what should be done if a child feels upset.
2 months on and my little boy has hardly been touched since and knows that if he is to go and find a teacher and tell her. Hes much happier too.
the one thing the teacher said was dont try and sort it yourself by telling your child to hit back or by speaking directly to the other parents.
a nice chat with the teachers away from the watchful eye of the kids and we decided that the best way was for the children to have a discussion about bullys and what should be done if a child feels upset.
2 months on and my little boy has hardly been touched since and knows that if he is to go and find a teacher and tell her. Hes much happier too.
the one thing the teacher said was dont try and sort it yourself by telling your child to hit back or by speaking directly to the other parents.
Unfortunately,going by the experiences of my children/grandchildre/and now gt grandchildre,it is just this " jostling and name calling" that lead to more serious bullying.
Children are not like adults(obviously) and they do not think of the conswquences of their anti social actions.
They will try out the jostling and name calling,and when they find a child who doesn't wan to get involved,OR actually shrinks away from it,then the "hard" bullying will start.
Sad to say some schools have an ehtos of such behaviour in children,and teachers look on it (like the lady on the radio) as being part of growing up,IT ISN'T!
Because of this ethos bullying is swept under tha carpet,and ignorde,often with fatal consequences.
Too many children (even today in the 21st century) are severely bullied,but because teachers are unaware,or actively ignore it,the children are terrified to tell anyone.
So remeber,this supposed "normaL" jostling etc is not normal,and allows bullies to prey on children to weak or terrified to report it,or hit back.
We had such actions when I was at school(I am 86) but I ha hoped to see the ned of such actions,obviously I won't.
Children are not like adults(obviously) and they do not think of the conswquences of their anti social actions.
They will try out the jostling and name calling,and when they find a child who doesn't wan to get involved,OR actually shrinks away from it,then the "hard" bullying will start.
Sad to say some schools have an ehtos of such behaviour in children,and teachers look on it (like the lady on the radio) as being part of growing up,IT ISN'T!
Because of this ethos bullying is swept under tha carpet,and ignorde,often with fatal consequences.
Too many children (even today in the 21st century) are severely bullied,but because teachers are unaware,or actively ignore it,the children are terrified to tell anyone.
So remeber,this supposed "normaL" jostling etc is not normal,and allows bullies to prey on children to weak or terrified to report it,or hit back.
We had such actions when I was at school(I am 86) but I ha hoped to see the ned of such actions,obviously I won't.
Thank you for all your answers....
It is a tough one BOO, as you wlll always get kids telling tales, etc., but it can be very worrying for children & parents, 'specially after reading red's, Desperado's & Mr. Veritas's replies & of how to 'try' to deal with 'real' bullies.
Jake that particular women sounded like a real battleaxe!
It is a tough one BOO, as you wlll always get kids telling tales, etc., but it can be very worrying for children & parents, 'specially after reading red's, Desperado's & Mr. Veritas's replies & of how to 'try' to deal with 'real' bullies.
Jake that particular women sounded like a real battleaxe!
When our youngest daughter was little, she & another girl had a love-hate relationship, bless'em! One day they'd be bickering, the next cuddling up & skipping! All part of growing up!
I used to talk to both of them (together) & say how lovely it was when they played nicely, at school & in our house.
In time, we moved house & they went to different upper schools. They met up again years later & ended up going to each other's weddings! The other girl even named her daughter after our daughter - he little friend!
I used to talk to both of them (together) & say how lovely it was when they played nicely, at school & in our house.
In time, we moved house & they went to different upper schools. They met up again years later & ended up going to each other's weddings! The other girl even named her daughter after our daughter - he little friend!
A little bit of both, depends on the circumstances.
If the child has voiced a concern to the parent (which is a big step) then the school should be informed.
Trouble is many schools won't deal with the problem and try to brush under the carpet.
There was trouble at an academy school the other day the thing that troubled me most about that story was a placard placed on the fence saying "we will win, one way or another" win what?
You can't teach students with that attitude.
If the child has voiced a concern to the parent (which is a big step) then the school should be informed.
Trouble is many schools won't deal with the problem and try to brush under the carpet.
There was trouble at an academy school the other day the thing that troubled me most about that story was a placard placed on the fence saying "we will win, one way or another" win what?
You can't teach students with that attitude.
Although I am obviously happy with the outcome for redcrx' child, I can't say the nursery teacher was altogether right to say not to approach other parents, because we did when my daughter was being bulllied and it worked a treat! The other dad was horrified to think his daughter could be bullying soneone (in this case stealing my daughter's food) and it was all sorted out there and then. He'd been buying extra nice things to eat for his daughter, thinking she had an eating problem, and my daughter was going hungry all day. When he confronted her she broke down and said she didn't even know why she'd been doing it and both girls ended up good friends.
How awful for your daughter pips & embarrassing for the girls Dad! Glad they ended up friends though, as did our daughter & her friend.
I too would always go to the parents first & discuss it with them, but as others have said, some parents aren't always willing to do so, or accept that their little ones can do no wong! ;o$
I too would always go to the parents first & discuss it with them, but as others have said, some parents aren't always willing to do so, or accept that their little ones can do no wong! ;o$
of course its going to depends on the parents and whether you feel you can approach them, that why the nursery teacher said its best not to. Its not as if the school wouldve had to talk to his parents anyway if they are good at stopping it before it gets out of hand.
Any parent is going to feel that their child is innocent, its a normal reaction for them to try and defend the child, but there are parents that will refuse to believe their child is a bully and sometimes its because the parent shows such traits too. How will confronting them help matters for your own child?
One parent at nursery had told her bullied child to belt the bully back whenever he got hit, whos in the right then?
Any parent is going to feel that their child is innocent, its a normal reaction for them to try and defend the child, but there are parents that will refuse to believe their child is a bully and sometimes its because the parent shows such traits too. How will confronting them help matters for your own child?
One parent at nursery had told her bullied child to belt the bully back whenever he got hit, whos in the right then?
Yes, pips, it makes all the difference when parents are understanding & bring their children up with good morals, etc. Shame not everyone else is the same!
I agree red, it's so sad when parents are bullies themselves & instil their tactics & aggressiveness into their own children! Fighting a losing battle with people like that.Pardon the pun!
I agree red, it's so sad when parents are bullies themselves & instil their tactics & aggressiveness into their own children! Fighting a losing battle with people like that.Pardon the pun!
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