As you know from your other thread mrs_o, I hadn't seen this one before now.
Poor woman !
I have to say - if it were me, which thankfully it isn't, I would be absolutely mortified & humiliated to be told by more than one person at the same time! Especially if all I wanted to do was cry.
I would definitely either chose one good close friend to 'gently' tell her - or, my first option would be to speak to her husband & give him the chance to tell her himself. Let him squirm.....
Either way, this woman should know - 'specially if she's widowed & he's only after her money. (If that is true).
Thing is, she may forgive him, then find it difficult to face you & all who knew about it again.
Good luck. -xx-