the fathers involvement

[lisyjj]

i,ve recently found out i,m pregnant with my ex-boyfriends child?Do i have to name him as the father on the birth certificate and if so what rights does this give him as the father.He is making many threats saying he is going for full custody of our child

[sara3]

if you're not married, you can't name him on the birth cert unless he is with you at the time you register the birth.

[noway2]

I think thats all changed now sara.Why dont you want his name on the BC lis?Your child has a right to know who it's father is.

[sara3]

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Governmentcitizens andrights/Registeringlifeevents/Birthandadopti onrecords/Registeringorchangingabirthrecord/DG _175608

[bednobs]

it hasn't changed missnoway ...my friend's fiance died before their baby was born and she couldn't put his name on ithe BC

[k8bailey]

If you put his name on the birth cert,he'd have to go with you. Baby can have any surname though. Having his name on the birth cert meand he has parental responsibility, which means he'd have to be involved in any major descisions eg if you wanted to emigrate you'd need his consent, to take the child. Also means (I think) that he is liable for child support.

Think long and hard before you make a descision - yes your child has right to know who their father is but you also need to think about yourself.

[tamborine]

If he's making threats already - keep him off the Birth Cert. Father's can control travel abroad of their children etc. No marriage = no rights!

[gossipgirl]

the father has to be present when registering the birth of your child or the name cant go on there mariied or not. If his name is on the certificate then from what my partner and i were told when we registered our child, is that he will have equal rights to the child. My advice would be not to put him on if he hes making threats and trying to call the shots on your child, personally i think he needs to grow up! I know its hard but try not to take to much notice of his threats, unless you are a unfit mother no court is going to take your child from you. Why is he saying he wants full custody in the first place? The best person to raise your child is YOU {unless of course there is reason to think otherwise}. Did you split on bad terms? chances are hes blowing hot air and in time will calm down. good luck x

[lisyjj]

I split with him due to his temper and his violent rows and jealousy.A just want a peaceful pregnancy but his constant threats are weighing me down, A have no wish to cut him out from his child but everyday he comes up with something new and tell the truth its makin me ill .

[lil75]

Its a difficult decision, at the end of the day you would obviously want things to be as rational as possible for your child, but at the same time, do you really want someone in his/her and your life that is giving you a load of grief???

Having his name on the birth certificate does not automatically give him parental responsibilty, he would have to take you to court for that. He would have to go with you to register the birth to have his name on the certificate, but I think you have a lot to think about before putting him on there.....how old is he?

[k8bailey]

Just wanted to clarify - If you were married to the father he wouldn't need to go with you to register the birth, but since you are not married, the father would have to be present to have his name entered on the birth cert - these are the current rules

This is taken from Cardiff county councils website, which is my district but all councils in England and Wales follow the same rules.
"Who can register the birth?
If the parents of the child are married to each other at the time of the birth, it is possible for either parent to register the birth. However, if the parents are not married, the father's details can be entered into the register only if both parents attend together to register the birth. If this is not possible, please telephone the register office for advice.

If the father's details are not entered at the time of registration, it may be possible for this to be done at a later date. "


You may also find this website useful as it outlines who has parental responsibility, who can get it and how and also what it means. http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/ParentsRig hts/DG_4002954

If he's making threats I wouln't put him on the birth cert but thats something that only you can decide, you can add him later but you can't have him removed! Good luck. x

[leggysreturn]

Noway as youre APPARENTLY in eire .Theres noway youd know the rules in the uk.


Is there?


Ooops tripped up again numpty.

Gotta say if he was good enough for you to let into your pants then hes good enough to be named as father.

As long as it IS him?

Ive seen the jeremy kyle show and they always say its the ex boyfriends.
Sometimes it even is !!!!

[LFCFan5]

Leggy is there any need to be rude to this girl, ffs. If hes good enough to be let into her pants, what an awful thing to say. Unfortunately people do turn violent & she has been very brave to make him her EX & go the pregnancy alone, you cabbage. Good luck lisyjj x

[hanrushton]

you dont have to do anything you dont want to do!

even if his name is not on the birth certificate you can still claim child support of him.

i think that maybe explaining to your ex whilst your midwife is there that the stress he is puttin you under is not good for you or the baby.

if he does have a violent temper you should tell your midwife and let it go down on record. i also suggest you go to the local citizens advice centre who well be able to advise you legally on child support, suppervised access for your ex ect, i also think the family planning may be able to help you.

good luck
x x x x x x x x

[lynseylouh]

my husband is named on the birth certificate for his youngest daughter, however, before he got parental responsibility through the court my husbands ex, changed the childs surname to her maiden name because she did not like the fact that he had at the time, just met me. my husbands child is now known by a different surname organised and changed by deed poll through a solicitor, however, her does have regular access to the child, has parental responsibility, and pays csa. It does not matter what surname you give the child. I f the father can prove that the child is his, then he will be able to apply for certain rights such as parental responsibility. However, this is not guaranteed, and will depend upon the fathers character at court. My suggestion is to get a solicitor to represent you and to take out a restraining order to stop him from pestering you. That way your ex will be dealing with the solicitor and not you. Good Luck

[pfabc123]

Hi lisyjj
I take it that you have gone past the option to terminate. This guy will have rights even if he is not named on the birth certificate. If he is unemployed also he will get legal aid to take you to court and get a dna test. If it is proven that he is the father he will have many rights. CAFCASS will get involved to assess the situation once the child is born. Its a real shame that you have to have someone like this guy tied to you for life because you were both irresponsible in terms of your contaception. Sounds to me like this guy is a bully or has anger issues. Either way you dont want yourself or any child having anything to do with him. Its the child i feel sorry for because you made your bed and it looks like your prepared to lie in it.