Not sure if he wants marriage

[Jeffju]

I would love to marry my partner of three years. He has been married twice before and we have never talked about 'us' and marriage. We don't formally live together, we both have own properties.

He jokes with friends about never wanting to get married again and has said that I know this but we have actually never discussed it seriously together.

Should I wait, talk to him or change my thinking? I don't want to spoil a brilliant relationship.

[Androcles]

If you are saying you want to marry him and he is saying he doesn't want to marry again, you probably, sooner or later will have a problem. Think hard and long about where you want o be in another three years of the relationship and act accordingly!

[Bbbananas]

If it really is a "brilliant relationship" - just carry on with it then. Do you really think a bit of paper, will make it even more brilliant?

[ummmm]

If it's a brilliant relationship then you should be able to ask if he's sure he'll never marry again. If he doesn't want to and the relationship is that good, don't rock the boat. You have more than I a lot of couples.

[Charisse]

You really will not know how he feels until you talk to him.

It is no good second guessing him and by all accounts if you have never discussed it perhaps he does not know how you yourself feel?

[madmaggot]

Simple. Talk to each other; calmly and honestly so that you both know exactly where you stand with this 'brilliant' relationship.

[Brinjal]

Ding dong warning bells. Two previous marriages cant always be the other persons fault. Think carefully about whatyou could be letiing yopurself in for.

[Whoever]

Beware of getting what you wish for. If he's had two marriage failures already, why would he risk a third? He's already getting everything he needs out of his relationship with you - sex, companionship, friendship and his own personal space in his own home without risking losing his savings and paying maintenance if it all goes wrong again.
It sounds harsh but I think you're on a hiding to nothing. If you've been going together for three years and that hasn't convinced him that you are the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with in a firm commitment, I'd get out now if it's marriage you're seeking because it sounds as if he has no incentive or desire to tie the knot.