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Would you say anything or keep quiet? in The AnswerBank: Relationships & Dating
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Would you say anything or keep quiet?

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Velvetee | 22:38 Wed 10th Jun 2009 | Relationships & Dating
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With my recent relationship problems, I now feel I've probably got involved with a weird family.

Several months ago, my Partner's weird brother came to the house and needed to check his E Mails, so he logged on via my Laptop. Anyway, he didn't log out and his Hotmail account was still open when I logged on.

There were a number of E Mails where he'd been corresponding with other men, seeking sexual liaisons and he was also a member of various casual sex sites, again seeking men and also couples for dominant sex etc.

He's been in a longterm relationship with a woman for several years and has a child with her. I did hear recently they'd had a row, where she accused him of being Gay. His mother thought this was ridiculous as she thinks the sun shines out of his backside (and possibly other things)

If you were in my situation, would you want to tell his Partner what he's been up to or is it best to keep out of it? I've told his brother, my Partner and he say's it's none of his business. I think I would want to know if my Partner was messing around with another man.
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I would stay well out. You shouldn't have really looked into his account. His private life is private and he didn't mean for you to read it.

Massive can of worms you'll be opening and with everything that's been going on in your life, do you really want the hassle?

How long have you got left btw?
Question Author
Yes you're probably right, although I would want to know. I expect his partner has her suspicions, seeing as it has already been mentioned.

Baby's due this Saturday. thanks for your comments.
I just don't think you'd cope with the repercussions well. People don't appreciate it and you have a little baby coming. I know this is your first child and if you leave it for a bit you'll understand that the last thing you'd need is a family fallout and a newborn baby. Seriously.

I hope it goes well for you....and good luck x
otally agree ummm best not to interfere in the relationship of others especilly family you will come out the worse. like umm said it wasnt your place to read his emails. perhaps he deliberatly left it on as a test!!

goodluck with baby concetrate on yourself
Agree with the other posters.Concentrate on yourself and the impending new arrival.You will have more than enough to think about and do.

Someone else's sexuality is no concern of yours , and you should keep well out of the situatuation. It is not up to you to tell anyone anything, they probably know already iif they are honest with themseves.

You say you are mixed up with a weird family, I think that statement could apply to thousands of families, so get on with your own life and don't be tempted to meddle.

Sincerely hope all goes well for you on a personal level.
i would just pretend i didnt see anything and keep out, the truth always comes out in the end and your partners brothers girlfriend will find out for herself at some point. On the other hand though if i was that girlfriend i would feel extremely hurt that someone knew of this and didnt tell me. No matter what way you go about its a tough one, someones going to get hurt no matter what.
I think it will be the best if you just forget it and concentrate on your own family. good luck with the birth of your boy xxx
I wouldnt say anything... especially as not even your partners wants to get involved, shows you something...

Good luck witht he baby...

Congrats :)
I think the best thing to do is to blackmail him.

Then use the money to go on holiday
Agree with biggerlonger....... teeheheee!

Seroulsy, really not worth the agro, you have a huge massive wonderful thing about to happen, focus on that, you dont need the stress that telling his partner will bring. Really not wroth it. Also, you may get blamed for splitting them up, bler, bler, bler.

Dont do it sweets, stay the out of it, its the best way!

Good luck with your little one, hope the birth goes well and you guys bond quickly! Also hope you and your partner managed to sort everything.

Good luck, and get as much sleep as you can! You'll miss it, i know i do!!!! :)

xxx
Question Author
Thanks everyone. You're all right and it would be sensible to keep out of it. I expect his partner will find out for herself in due course.
I did not know that a hotmail account would remain open and still be logged on when another user logs on to the laptop. That does seem rather odd.

I think that you are desperate to interfere and so why not set up another hotmail account and then email his partner the log on details for the brothers' account.

Sorted.

I, on the other hand would leave well alone, but then again I am not a noseybeak....Oh, so you have forgiven your fiance his indescretions, good good.

Good Luck on your impending "delivery". I would have thought that you had more to be thinking about other than the "weird" family, but hey ho.
wow you sound like a right curtain twitcher gossip girl. its none of your busines love. try keep out of it and stop reading others personal mail. there is a good girl :)
x

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