normal?

[albaqwerty]

OH and I married for ages, sons pals stay (occasionally) at their pals, plenty of their pals are either at their mums or dads houses and tonight a pal wants to stay here because his dad has a male friend staying over and that makes him feel uncomfortable. surely his dad would put his son's feelings first? ok wrong section to put this in I know but .....

[ummmm]

Parents deserve to have a life as well.

[jackthehat]

I would say that a person who is gay is perfectly capable of having sex with a person of the opposite sex which results in the production of a child.

The production of this child does not alter a persons fundamental sexuality.

We really haven't been given enough information to speculate as to where the chap in this case would place himself in the spectrum of human sexuality.

[albaqwerty]

I understand what you are all saying, fortunately it's not one of mine. I was wondering how I could chat to this young man about the situation as it bothers him, however I'll be my usual up-front self. (Teenagers have enough problems don't they?)

[craft1948]

As I see it (maybe incorrectly) the father has his son to stay for one night on a regular basis. Regardless of whether the father is homo or hetero, if the son is uncomfortable with the father's new relationship, surely it is not asking a lot for him to spend the night without his partner.

[devilspawn]

pink - sorry, was using the term child and kid to show a difference - I too understand that he is an adult, but at the end of the day he is still the dads child - irrespective of age

If my dad suddenly decided he was gay it would be an immense shock to me - and i have been an adult for quite some time!!

[jojojojoanne]

noone is denying a parent the right to a life, maybe if they explained their 'inconsistent past lifestyles' he may be more accepting afterall they are his parents and the only parents he will know

[albaqwerty]

thank you craft, on the occasional visit from his son you'd think Dad could say to his pal "not tonight".

[jackthehat]

Perhaps this chap has been 'out' for a long time and it is only now that the son is starting to feel uncomfortable ?

'inconsistent past lifestyles' !?! - nonsense........

[jackthehat]

The 'friend' isn't a sailor on limited shore-leave is he ? :o)

[pinktwink]

perhaps the son generally spends his time at his dads in his room listening to music like all boys his age. There are so many perhaps . The best thing is for the boy to talk to his dad or could you mention it to him

[craft1948]

If the father wants to spend the night with his partner when his son is staying I think he is trying to push the son into accepting the relationship......big mistake...

[jojojojoanne]

inconsistent in that they haven't been consistent in their choice, imo a person cant call themselves a lesbian unless they have only had relationships with women and the same with men they cant strictly say they are homosexual unless they've only had relationships with men, otherwise isn't it just, i had a realtionship with a woman then a man vice versa?

[jackthehat]

Well, your opinion is wrong.

[pinktwink]

maybe we are all reading too much into it. Perhaps it is only a male friend as in company whilst son stays in room. If a mother had a female friend staying over what would we say

[jojojojoanne]

why? without the shades of grey,surely a lesbian is a lesbian and a homosexual is a homosexual?if they felt so strongly about that then they would never 'experiment' surely?

[jackthehat]

Leave in the shades of grey; these can be made of 'family expectation' or 'self expectation' or 'lack of awareness' or 'lack of opportunity' or 'cultural disapproval' or myriad other reasons............

[jojojojoanne]

bisexuality depends on shades of grey existing?
how many lesbians do you think there are who have at least kissed a man and how many gay men have kissed a woman? can this be reasonably be described as true homosexuality? (not including kissing family members of the opposite sex as that could potentially get too complicated!)then on the other hand there are probably gay and lesbian men and women who could never physically do this,

[jackthehat]

bisexuality depends on shades of grey existing?
Bisexuality IS its own category, apparently.
how many lesbians do you think there are who have at least kissed a man and how many gay men have kissed a woman?
Certainly far more than you.......
can this be reasonably be described as true homosexuality? (not including kissing family members of the opposite sex as that could potentially get too complicated!)
Absolutely.
then on the other hand there are probably gay and lesbian men and women who could never physically do this,
Undoubtedly.

[jojojojoanne]

obv more people than me as im not everone! so is kissing members of the opposite sex acceptable if you on the one hand claim to be homosexual? is this acceptable to a 'true' (for want of an alternative word) homosexual one that has only ever had intimate relations with their own sex?

[jackthehat]

I meant that I obviously believe that there have been far more lesbians or gay men who have kissed 'the opposite side' than you do......

so is kissing members of the opposite sex acceptable if you on the one hand claim to be homosexual?
Acceptable to whom ? It's not some sort of club where you can have your membership revoked if you offend the committee.
is this acceptable to a 'true' (for want of an alternative word) homosexual one that has only ever had intimate relations with their own sex?
Please provide examples to support your definition of 'true' homosexual with details of how they can be differentiated from the common or gardens 'ones'.........