step-brother and sister in a relationship

[puma86]

A very good friend of mine is in a relationship with her step-brother. I must add, they didn't grow up together. My friend lived with her mother and the bloke lived with his mother and step-father. His step-father is her father.
There was a distance of about 131 miles between them and they only saw each other growing up when she went to stay with her father in the summer school holidays and every other xmas.
I have known for years that she more than liked him and kept trying to get her to tell him, and she finally told him 2yrs ago. Turns out he felt the same!
They has a secret relationship and travelled to see each other every other weekend.
After about 4 months he was really pushing her to tell the family of what was going on. She started to panic I think and not long after they broke off the relationship.
She would still phone him and vice versa and when both of them found new partners they went berserc at each other?!
Near on a year after they first got together she decided she did really want him no matter what and dropped everything to move to be with him. After 3 months of secretly dating they told their parents - who weren't surprised at all. Turns out they had their suspicions for a long time.
They have now been living together for about 9months and are expecting a baby .
Anyway...........
All of his friends know who she is in relation to him and are fine with it. But, she has only told a few very close friends. She is still scared of what people think of their relationship and feels people will think they have done something wrong.
I personally think it is sweet that they are finally happy (they first met 17yrs ago) and think she should confont people and not be scared about telling the truth about who they are if people ask how they met.
I want to help her feel more at ease and thought emailing her your replies tonight might make her feel better.

Thank guys
Kate :o)

[tamborine]

Nephew & step-sis had same off/on relationship. It is legal & not incestuous as they're not blood-related.

[puma86]

Hey Tambo,
Oh yeah I know all that, she knows but I think that some people hear the 'brother' and 'sister' bit and they freak.
I think she's having these probs because she did have one person 'kick off' that what she was doing was wrong.

[ummmm]

They are relative strangers.

[another-view]

Do they by any chance play the banjo?

[snags]

Think of Deliverance but with East Anglian accents...

[craft1948]

One of my mates married his long-term foster sister (2nd marriage for both of them).....no big deal...

[puma86]

a-v..... you're so mean :o( lol

[another-view]

Craft, he wasn't called Zeke and liked to chew corn was he?

[puma86]

craft - I'd never thought of that. Forgot about foster siblings, same thing I guess really.

[mccfluff]

i thought that was funny :-)

anyway when i first read the heading i thought urgh, then when i read it and realised that they aren't bloodyrelated, then no biggie, & hope they're happy. Hope your friend will start to feel more comfortable soon, and is there any real need to explain their situation to people they meat, unless they ask i suppose?

[puma86]

yeah thats the problem she has. Her colleagues and new friends she makes ask how they met, and she struggles. last I knew she was just saying 'through family', which i suppose isn't lying lol.

Snags............ harsh. They're not commiting incest are they. meany

[paross]

Good for them. They are unrelated ,' step' means nothing. Tell them not to explain anything to anyone, then there will be no bitchiness.

[craft1948]

We were talking about maiden names at work one day and one girl was quite reluctant to join in (she had quite an unusual married name). After some time she admitted that her maiden name was the same as her married one......she apparently married her first cousin and felt uncomfortable telling people this.

[ummmm]

So would I craft.

[another-view]

So would anyone.

[puma86]

yeah i would too.

Thats a little different though. It's legal but they are still a blood relation.

[mccfluff]

lol that was blood related not bloody related

[craft1948]

No the punch line was but they didn't know at the time......he was actually adopted!!!

[coccinelle]

I have never understood why two people who have no blood link can be called sister or brother as in step sister and step brother. However, if two people share a parent, well, yes they are blood related. It might be time with so many families being in this same situation to drop the brother and sister thing and come up with something else. I might add the same applies to sister/brother in laws etc but people don't seem to bother about somebody marrying their sister in law or brother in law.