A very sad situation

[pericat]

My friends BIL had cancer in the pelvis, fought it successfully and in the process had an almost quarter body amputation. Anyway the cancer has returned and he's due to have chemo in may just to delay the inevitable. I've heard tthrough another source that he's booked a first class flight to the US and a jeep and has headed off with a friend. What do you think? To hell with everything and live life or what about wife and 2 kids left at home.

[bigfoot3000]

Sorry to hear that. Why not take the wife and kids and enjoy his last moments with them?

[20SilkCut]

Sorry to hear that Peri...if it was me and i was in travelling condition, i'd say to hell with everything and go out with all guns blazing... x

[ummmm]

That would depend how long he has left....

Going to America might be on his 'to do before you die' list...

[ttfn]

I suppose peri you would have to be in a similar situation to answer the question.

[NoMercy]

How does the wife feel about it?

[bigfoot3000]

I suspect that she can't be too chuffed knowing that her hubby might die on another continent without having said goodbye properly to her or the little uns. How old are the kids pericat?

[sara3]

just like the film, The Bucket List.

it's a toughie.. hopefully he'll get back to spend his final days with his family. I kind of admire him though.

[pericat]

I don't know as I've heard it from another source - another friend spoke to his brother tonight. He is my best friend from schools BIL but I also have another good friend who is friends with his brother. I have a feeling that my friend from school may not know how bad it is

[pericat]

The kids are 14 and 20

[ummmm]

If he has to be back in May for treatment it doesn't look like he's going for long.

One last lads holiday.....I think I'd let my OH do it. Even if it meant biting my tongue.

[craft1948]

If that's what 'does it' for him who can argue with it. It may not be what his wife wants but at this stage it's all about him not her.

[welshlibranr]

Very sad!......maybe he feels he has to do this for himself, just to deal with it all!....but very hard for his family! I do hope he gets home to see them all before the end!.............He probably isn't thinking logically at present given the circumstances......none of us know waht we would do in the same situation, do we?.....................

[yogi-bear]

Sorry to hear this news, peri.

It is difficult to fully understand what he is going through...maybe his wife and kids encouraged him to go... and as ummmm says, maybe it's on his "things to do list".

Would be nice if he took the whole family with him though, as would be a great memory for them.

Hope you're well peri, my lovely xx

[bigfoot3000]

Well if it's unlikely that he's going to pass away straight away then as ummmm says, let the guy go on a crazy party for his friends to remember him by and let him come home and rest with his family for his last moments.

[Mamyalynne]

Hopefully they have discussed it as a family and agreed, god bless them all.

[welshlibranr]

I agree bigfoot, I'm sure his family will understand why he feels the need to do this!..............and they will hopefully be there with him at the end................

[naomi24]

It's very hard on the family, but people often do the unexpected at times like this. Who knows what's going on in his mind? Although we all think we know how we would deal with such a situation, we can't really know until it happens. Maybe this is something he's always wanted to do, so this is his last chance, and when he's done it, he'll come home and spend the rest of his time with his family.

[pericat]

I don't think we do know what we'd do - I'm fine thanks yogi. I don't know whether to ring my friend (his SIL) as I think her family thinks she is weak and can get unwell so keep things from her. When he was originally diagnosed she heard it from me when I rang to see if she was ok . That was so dreadful and upsetting !

[marval]

How very sad, it must have been a most difficult decision for him. I hope that he can enjoy his time in America, and have time with his family when he returns. My thoughts are with them all and you.