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teenage troubles

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woodpam | 12:45 Fri 06th Sep 2002 | Body & Soul
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how can I get my 19 year old out of bed for work in the morning without screaming at him? He'd get the sack if I just let him sleep and I can't afford to keep him.....
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unless he is a vegetarian stand at his door with cooked bacon afeter half waking him up thats sure to work
It's time to let your son accept the adult responsibilities that go with his adult status. You should not accept responsibility for your son getting up in a morning - simply remind him once, and once only, that as from Monday, he will be responsible for getting out of bed on time. If he loses his job, advise him that you will expect two thirds of his Benefit payment towards his bed and board, and failure to deliver will result in the loss of ammeities - food, hot water, a bed to sleep in etc. You are doing your adult (and he is an adult!) son no favours by pretending that the big bad world is some kind of extended nursery where he is looked after to this extent. Make him act his age, it's about time.
Actually, recent research suggests that teenagers aren't acting up when they say they can't get out of bed - it's really true and is a part of the puberty process. However, that's not a reason to let him sleep in of a morning... It's a splendid reason to tell him to go to bed earlier though, isn't it?
We had a son like this, although I think he was a lot younger than your lad. It was an instant cure - my husband crept into his bedroom and put a soaking wet cold flannel over his face!! He never did it again - and even now he still remembers it - tough love with humour, unbeatable combination!
just tell him to grow up and take responsibilities for his own actions and it would help if you stop mothering him.
A friend of mine used a fine method to wake himself up in the morning. He got a large alarm clock, one of the ones with large bells on the top, and after setting it locked it into a tin chest, which applified the ringing until it was unbearable. He put the key to the chest into a deep tube of cold water, and once he had plunged his arm into this in order to get the key he was well and truly awake! Not very restful for the others who lived in the house though!
I cannot believe you asked that . . . is he not old enough to be taking responsibility for his own life? I think you've done your bit.
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Thanks for all your answers - my house is no longer a war zone as his employer has introduced flexi time and he can start later. Amazingly the thought of having to finish later to compensate is making him think about starting work earlier. (And they say women are illogical) Anyway I'm relieved to say its his decision now, as long as I'm not supporting him financially, I'm happy! Thanks again for your input.
I am 19 and i know the trauma of being made to get out of bed. i could sleep 12+ hours a day and still be struggling out of bed. Just leave us be :P

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