Oh Jesus Christ....

[NoMercy]

My mother is giving me advice re my weekend away.

"Don't forget to do your lady garden."

I just want the ground to open up and swallow me.

[boxtops]

AArgh, you didn't mention that bit, NoM - Dads don't like to think of their daughters Getting up to No Good....

[Barmaid]

I am lmao NoM - I didn't realise she had said that in front of dad. I'd have died.

[NoMercy]

He's my stepfather. He looked mildly shocked, tutted and mumbled something about going into the garage. Haven't seen him since.

[Barmaid]

I always remember at my great aunts funeral about 20 years ago, I was there with my mum because she was playing the organ and I used to turn her pages for her. Afterwards we had a wake and another great aunt rocked up. The conversation turned to the elderly gentleman who had befriended my deceased aunt and we all wondered if he was a boyfriend. We were quickly disabused of this notion when my very elderly great aunt opined "He was no boyfriend of Evie's. He takes it up the elbow".

Stunned silence followed.

[~Wingnut~]

Oh barmaid that is just brilliant!!! lol Life should be more about giggles like that!

[NoMercy]

Barmaid... I'm doubled up here !! lol

[joggerjayne]

OMG HB ... mums just shouldn't be doing THAT conversation !!

[NoMercy]

I think she only said it to make me blush or provoke a reaction. Silly mare.

[boxtops]

Nah NoM, she meant "we know you're going to walk about in the nud"

[Barmaid]

Well I suppose that worked then!!!!!!!!!!!!

[NoMercy]

Moi... walk around in the nud? I wouldn't put anyone through that...

[rowanwitch]

I suppose I ought to think about getting my pruners sharpened pretty soon....

[Mamyalynne]

Topiary is very much the in thing girls!♥

[jno]

wax lyrical, haha