Advice Please re partners daughter

[MikeCwall]

Hi - just after some advice really. Im a 23 y/old guy and have recently moved in with my gorgeous partner who is in her late 30s...the age gap means nothing to either of us. The only fly in the ointment if thats the best term to use is her daughter from her previous relationship, shes 19 and only stays with her mother when shes not at university, or at her fathers etc, which means my partner gets to see her every now and then.

She seemed happy that her mother has found someone else, but when she stayed over recently she did get a bit jealous that the attention wasnt all on her. She then took to walking round the upstairs when she knew I was up there as well in just her bra and panties, and "accidently" bumping into me as I leave the bathroom having had a shower.

Now shes an attractive young woman, and Id admit had I met her first maybe a relationship would have blossomed, but how can I put it politely that shes making me feel uncomfortable the way shes acting, whilst not damaging the relationship between mother and daughter.

TIA

[Mamyalynne]

What may seem a dream come true for some men is making you feel uncomfortable. I would try to laugh if off by jokingly saying 'do cover up love you will catch your death' or words to that effect. A word with your partner may help too, she may be playing a game, if so don.t fall for it.

Good luck

Mamya

[Mamyalynne]

Plus always cover up yourself, not just a towel around your waist but a bathrobe.

[woofgang]

Are you close enough to your partner to say something on the lines of "I am sure she doesn't mean it and I don't want to embarrass her but I am am an old fashioned kind of guy and I am finding your daughters modern manners a bit blush making......"

[carmalee]

Mike the part that says 'if I'd have met her first' etc makes me think you are protesting a little too much and are tempted. Dangerous situation for all concerned especially you who have moved into your partner's home. Can see it all ending in tears.

[MikeCwall]

carmalee - Havent moved into my partners house..she has sold hers, and we have a new place together. I will admit there is a temptation there...any man would. Shes nearer my age etc, but thats it, we have nothing else in common. Obv Im not trying to replace her father...and cant see myself being "stepdad" material...rather just be her mate who hopefully will be married to her mother in time

im finding myself having to make excuses so I know that im only in the house when my partner is...and shes getting suspicious. IF i tell her whats being going on then Ive potentionally ruined their relationship..possibly ours as well

[JackDanielsU]

Id be careful...

Knock her back using the wrong way, and she could come out with all sorts to her mother saying how you kept flirting with her etc pinning the blame on you

Sounds corny but lay off the drink whilst shes there. Temptation is there youve said and if your guard is down after a few pints then you could be in a whole heap of trouble

[saxy_jag]

I think you really do need to have confidential talk with your partner. She must be aware of potential problems in this area, and she is the one who knows her daughter best and will be able to talk to her appropriately.

What sort of terms are you on with the girl's father? Just wondered if it might be worth having a chat with him? Many girls will listen to their dads where they just poo-poo whatever their mothers have to say.

[SizzleSquid]

how dare u suggest that you are comitted to ur partner then lust after ur partners daughter? so what if the daughter is nearer your age? for you to even be tempted it just goes to show what a poor partner you are to your girlfriend/fiance. whats wrong with you? if the girl is attractive-just see it as that-and not entertain your 'temptation' feelings,and for yo to suggest that if you met the daughter first a relationship could have blossomed suggests you had ore than an accidental meeting upstairs. how would you know if a relationship could have blossomed? How do u know shes doing it on purpose or is it your horny mind thinking she is? Basically-you fancy your partners daughter-i wouldnt want to go out with some one like you. Your only redeeming factor is that you dont like the situation.
All you have to do is tell your partner-look, i appreciate that your daughyer has come to visit you, however i feel uncomfortable with her walking around in her underwear whilst i am in the house and i wont stand for it, as i am not her dad.Please ask your daughter to consider that i am in the house and to be more respectful. If the daughter has a problem-then she can find somewhere else to live, shes 19, an adult, not a child. And if you cant keep your eyes off her then i suggest you do the decent thing and move out-as that is rattish behaviour, no matter how much you love your partner. .

[zzxxee]

just throw her a dressing gown and dont say anything

[oldexpat]

Personally I would just enjoy the view and take it no further.