i dont think that he wanted you in his life, he just took the chance to have sex as you had "insisted" on going on holiday............and as i read it , you basically " begged" to be allowed to go................and i think you probably hoped that you would have sex, and that you would be able to get him to want you back.
well, you got what you wanted, on holiday that is , but i really do think if you hadnt had the holiday none of this would have happened..................
it is easy to say give it up, but if you can you will save yourself an awful lot of angst, cos it wont last however much you hope it will, but it wont.............. therefore give it up and move on, be strong, cos being weak will just cause you pain.................... more pain and it will mess you up in this important year.
dont let it mess you up, only you can stop it doing so, you can not expect him to not mess you up.
good luck