How Long Must I Pay My Ex?

[Amilcar]

After a 29 yr marriage, I had a clean break divorce, finalised in Jan.1998. Part of the settlement was that I should pay my ex-wife a nominal £1 a year which I have done every Sept. since. I understand why this was required though she is financially independent and far better off than I. I have had no contact with her since the divorce save the sending of this cheque which I find an unwelcome annual reminder and would like to free myself of the commitment. What are the rules governing this and would there be any risk in raising the matter, say offering to pay a twenty year lump in advance and be done with it?

[bednobs]

what does it say in the settlement about the length of time? I have no idea why it was required for you to give her a pound every year, it seems very unusual! She probably hates recieving it as much as you hate writing it so why not just ask her if it can stop?

[ummmm]

Does she actually ash the cheques?

[ummmm]

Lol...either :-)

[wolf63]

ummmm - did you mean to say "ash the cheque'?

amilcar - is there any way of getting in contact with your wife and coming to an arrangement? Maybe a third party could get involved.

[Barmaid]

This is quite normal. The reason this has happened is that the ex wife probably applied for Spousal Maintenance. The Court clearly decided not to award SM, but in order to ensure that should the ex wife fall on hard times, they have awarded a nominal amount. This means that if the ex wife does fall on hard times, she can ask for a Variation of the order to up the spousal maintenance (if she had not been awarded anything, she would not have been able to apply later down the line).

The difficulty I foresee is that unless the ex is very comfortable, I doubt she will agree. The only way to get rid of it is to apply to Court and I would think that (unless she has remarried) the Court is unlikely to vary the order.

[tastymorsel]

When I was divorced I was awarded 10p per year from my ex husband.This was explained to me by the court that because I was financially independent of him he wasn't obliged to support me.However should my circumstances change and I had to rely on the state for financial support he would automatically have been made to pay me more.This was to prevent any delay by going through court again as an order was already in place.Needless to say he never paid it and I never pursued it.It was automatically cancelled when I married again anyway

[ummmm]

I didn't the spouse received maintenance after a divorce....

So, when I get married he'll have to support me if we divorce?

[Amilcar]

Thanks for all the interest. I think that I'll leave 'sleeping dogs lie.' And, if you knew my ex, you'd know how appropriate that phrase is!

[Hopkirk]

Why not send a cheque for £40, and tell her to remind you in 41 years that you owe her?

[wolf63]

amilcar - take your cruel words back - I have never met a dog that I didn't like, humans are different.............

[Amilcar]

Apologies to dogs everywhere and, yes, she does cash the £ every year.

[Amilcar]

With apologies to dogs, and yes, she does cash the £ every year...

[joko]

i agree with hopkirk...dont cancel the order as i supose the court want it in place 'in principle' but write to her sending a cheque for a larger sum and leave it at that (keep records of the cheque, letter etc of course just in case she tries to claim you havent paid...an leave it at that.

you could always set up a new bank account with say £40 in it and set up a direct debit...then just forget about it...