Chores for children, Yes or no.?

[JoAnnMul]

I have 2 boys aged 9 & 4, they both tidy away their toys after they finish (when I remind them)The eldest will make himself & his little bro cereal or toast using the toaster, although if there isn't a clean bowl he would go without rather than wash one & every now & then he MIGHT make me a coffee. His only 'job' is to hang the clothes in the wardrobes, otherwise I do everything else myself. My friend,whose 11year old helps with everything says that I'm too soft & creating 'lazy kids'.So I would be interested to hear others opinions.What chores do your children do..??

[Peri]

Hi Jo.  I have a 15 year old boy who works with his dad but does get paid for it.  I usually find I have to loose it to get him to do anything around the house as he is all fingers and thumbs which is just an act. But he has proved himself more than capable of doing the ironing and cleaning up.  My girls are 12 and 8 and the 12 year old is very good at helping so much so that I ask her to do more than the others as she is more capable and that is not fair but as she is heading towards being a teenager the enthusiasm isn't there as much.  My eight year old wants to help and is dusting and hoovering for me as we speak but I will probably have to redo it.  The whole thing is probably a matter of having a lot of patience and not being too house proud

[JoAnnMul]

hi peri, thats the thing my eldest done the washing up twice, but most had to be re-done, I couldn't risk him with an iron he has the attention span of a gnat, I have lamanted(sp?)flooring so I dont let him mop incase he gets it to wet, so I suppose the only thing left is polishing. But already he's wise to the fact that if he does a bad job he wont be asked again. So I guess I'll have to get use to making him do it again. Before I had children I thought I would 'train them up' from a young age but they grow sooo fast dont they..!! Right I'm off to fetch him the duster....

[Solarjunkie]

JoAnn - washingup etc needs practice! Your original idea of "train'emyoung" was right, so get in there quick before they get any older! Each member of the family should contribute what they can, eg even a 2 year old can carry dishes to the kitchen to be washed.

I was brought up that it was not "helping" but just simply "doing" whether I was mixing concrete or sewing on buttons (both of which I did from 7 or 8). 

Jobs around the house are not punishments - they can be fun! For dusting, use old white socks on the hands, the idea is to get them as dirty as you can. Get a second iron, put the radio on, let them do pillowslips while you do shirts, have a laugh!

[Jules001]

I have 2 children aged 13 and 17 and from an early age they have helped lay the table and then clear away after a meal. My daughter who is 13 is very practical and loves to help around the house and especially in the kitchen, she watches when I am cooking etc and asks questions and can now cook a lasagne amongst other things completely from scratch. My son will load the dishwasher when he is trying to get around me for something . I do make them strip their own beds when due for washing and remake them with fresh sheets etc. They are also responsible for keeping their own rooms tidy and putting away their clean clothes. I think it does no harm for children to do some chores (I am not talking about major housework here). I used to always have to take the rubbish out and peel the potatoes and prepare veg for our evening meal when I was a child.

[Annielappo]

I think jo that theses are your children and as long as you and your children are happy in the chores you set then great.  I wouldnt worry to much as to what other people say if i took all the advice of my friends i wouldnt know where to being.  The rule in my house with my kids is to tidy up after themselves.  We get on fine with that rule.  In fact my eldest has started to volunteer to do more chores,  which i said is fine so we have started up pocket money. 

[Kingaroo]

My 9 and 12 year old boys alternate months with a specific list of chores:

Month A

clear table, put away leftovers, wipe counters

empty trash and recycling

clean up after the dog

Month B

load the dishwasher, hand wash the pots

feed and walk the dog

They have been on this system over a year and it works fine, though they still need to be reminded and sometimes called back to finish bits they missed.

Jobs they can do for pay:

mow the lawn

clean the bathroom (not very well, but better than nothing)

take all the big outdoor trash and recycling bins to the curb on trash day, and take them back

They can't vacuum worth beans, though, and don't seem to understand the concept of "putting away the clean clothes I just washed and sorted and folded for you"

[hellywellywo]

I have an 8 yr old girl and a 2 yr old boy.  Megan has to keep her room tidy by toys being put away neatly, book shelf kept tidy, bed made every day, polished and hoovered at least once a week. She also has to set up the table for any meal time and then put it away and during school holidays she helps do the housework twice a week. Eddie is only little but he has to tidy away his toys (he needs help with this at the moment is getting better at it), when meg sets up the table he takes out the table mats and knives and forks etc, to her and helps me sort the washing into piles.  So I think it is a good thing to get the kids to help out around the house.

[woofgang]

I am not a Mum, but well remember going off to college at the age of 18 (35 years ago) Those of us who had helped at home had no problem with doing for ourselves, keeping the place tidy, getting to lectures on time and so on. It was painful for those who had never looked after themselves or others. IMHO its not so much about laziness as acquiring skills and attitudes!

[kick3m0n]

I totally agree with woofgang.....it's learning about life and how to do simple tasks.   I'm not being funny, but it's about kids (especially boys) learning not to take women for granted and pull their weight.  The lessons you teach them will stay with them for life - and any future wife will thank you for it.  My wee guy is 2 this month and is at that age where he just LOVES to help.  We do dusting and hoovering together, and he helps empty the dishwasher and put away non sharps and non breakables. He knows where more of our kitchen stuff goes than his daddy does!!! He loves to help bake and knows how to put all the garden waste in the recycling bin (with a littel help).   It's fun, not chores, and I fully intend to keep him helping us as he gets older, especially when he begins to want pocket money.

[Butty]

Our 2 1/2 year old little girl likes to help around the house and does all the regular stuff like unloading the dish washer, putting away her toys and jigsaws, etc. 

She also knows that she has to help with her pony, which includes using the shovel to fill the muck buckets, helping to sweep up (which admittedly she struggles with at the moment but we encourage her), leading her pony from the stable to the field etc.

I think it's great that she wants to join in and is so enthusiastic. 

[WendyS]

Just think, one day your future daughter-in-laws will thank you if you have produced two house-trained boys.

Sharing simple household chores and accepting resonsibility is good training for the team work they will need to be involved in during their adult life.

Behind every lazy man there's usually an over-indulgent mother !

[sam82]

hey there i dont have children, but i have just moved into the most wonderful house with my partner. At home when i was growing up my brother and i always helped, mainly doing the dishes and keeping our rooms tidy... as we got older, we would do the hoovering, polish etc.

 well to the point now, my boyfriends parents done everything up until 3 weeks ago done all his ironing, made his dinners, done his dishes even if they where not eating.... even when they done his ironing he wouldnt put it away left it in a pile on top of his chest of drawers, he has never polished anything, and a hoover emm never seen one.... well i think teaching your kids how to do basic house hold chores puts them in good sted for the future, as for me im training a 22 year old how to polish...use a hoover and remember to put his work clothes in the washing so he has clean things for monday..

please parents think of the person who will one day marry your child... lol

Oh and yes i keep threatening my partners mum that her beloved son will be moving back to her house... and you can imagine she doesnt have all the extra work to do so she doenst want him lol.....

[witchone]

I am a single mum and I have 3 children, who all have chores, they have daily chores and weekly chores, they do their chores without being asked, and most of the time without moaning about them, if they dont do their chores each day, they are all aware that they then lose their "internet time" the next day.

11 yr old daughter, does the washing up every evening. And once a week she sorts the recycling out.

9 yr old son, hoovers the living room and hallway everyday evening, and puts the rubbish out each week.

5 yr old son, sets and clears the dinner table every evening, and collects the newspapers and magazines and puts them in a bundle every week.

Everyweek, they also all help me on a saturday morning dust and polish the house, whilst i clean the kitchen and bathroom.

I have never really had any problems about it with them, and we do it all in such a way that it actually becomes family fun, stereo on loud and us all singing away. If they do their chores all week long, then saturday afternoon we have a trip out to the beach or park, or hire a dvd. They have been doing chores for the last 2 yrs since their dad left us, and they understand that its for everybodies benefit.

[conkarin]

hi jo. my blessing is now 10. 11 in October, He does almost evrythin i do, washes and dries dishes, brings the washing from the line, does his room, goes to the shop when needed, fetches the hangers when i am ironing, helps cook if in the mood, can rely on him 95% to habve the dishes done and living area tidy for me coming in from work.  Hoovers when asked, now i do get a little moaning but nothing to mention.  Connor has been helping me since he was 5/6.  Sorts his breakfast in the morning, wether toast or cereal can get me a coffee if requested.  Very trustworthy and helpful young man.  Not to say that this will probably change when he hits the teenage years, hope not.  I have always stuck to the value when i ask i put a please at the end, just to help mum out, son.  and guilt or his consience does the rest.  Start young and stick to your values.   A small treat every now and again stating what the treat was for, ie this is for helping me out for the past week with the dishes etc.  hope this helps.