Understand speech impediments with dignity

[evedawn]

hypothetical Q: You receive a telephone call from person who wishes to make a complaint, personbhas a speech impediment and is v difficult to understand them - how would you handle this situation? My thoughts were: ask them to come in personally but then I realised that's not always feasible and would poss annoy an already annoyed person MORE. My second thought was get them to put complaint in writing but then that doesn't seem right (Esp if the problem is fairly minor) so how would YOU respond and ensure callers dignity is upheld ?

[sara3]

you have to not humiliate them as that would possibly make their speech problems worse, and let them try to finish a sentence. if you really could not understand them, and don't think a colleague could deal with it better, you would just have to apologise and explain this. they then have the option of getting someone to call back to explain the problem better or taking other avenues.

they will probably have come up against this before and would know better than you how to take it forward.

[Andyvon]

My wife suffered a brain injury several years ago now which has left her needing full time care (from me). Mrs A can't read or write anymore, she doesn't understand money, cooking etc nor does she know where home is until we are outside the door. Her short term memory is very bad, anything learned one day is gone the next. Mrs A watches the same TV programmes several times a week and it's all new each time. My wife is also unable to talk very well and has trouble making herself undestood. I have learned what she is trying to say and I seem to have learned to understand her. However, it's surprising the number of people who don't have the time or patience to wait for her to get words out or make herself understood. I used to watch shop assistants just wave her away if she was trying to ask for a card for me for example. Now I have to buy and write my own cards as my wife used to get so distressed and so did I. Possibly it was a minority - but it was a lot of people! Sometimes we would come across someone who was prepared to spend a little time with my wife trying to undrstand her and that left us both very happy and pleased..

My wife doesn't use the phone as she can't dial numbers (we tried for so long!), she gets very confused and has her speech problems. However, if you do come across someone with a speech impediment Eve you can do nothing better than be patient and let the caller talk in their own time. Let them finish their sentences, don't rush them and then just talk to them as you would anyone else. Please also remember that it takes a lot of courage for them to call in the first place so to just be dismissed by someone impatient is really shattering.

[sara3]

Andy, I am sorry to hear about your wife. I witnessed something similar when my ex had a massive stroke some years ago. it took him a long time to build enough confidence to make a phone call, or even try to converse with strangers.

patience and understanding is what's needed.

[woofgang]

I would fib a bit and say I had a problem hearing people on the phone sometimes, apologise very profusely and ask them to please bear with me and speak slowly. I used to communicate a lot with people who were speech impaired after stroke and was never very good at it. I used to confess that I wasn't and ask them to please be patient with me.

[boxtops]

is it possible to give them an email address and suggest that they email you? We have a policy that complaints should be in writing, that adds weight to asking them to write to you.

[sara3]

evedawn, why don't you tell us what you actually did?

dependant on the reasons for the speech impediment, reading, writing and typing may also be an issue.

[Eve]

As much patience as possible really. My uncle is medically disabled and due to that combined with other factors, his speech is very unclear.

I am pretty good at understanding though I've known him all my life, I've found it's helped me when I've done a lot of other voluntary work with people with disabilities who have speech difficulties. I can imagine others would find him incredibly difficult to understand, if not impossible sometimes.

At least having the patience to try is very important.

[Andyvon]

It hasn't been easy Sara. It took me 5 weeks to teach Mrs A to tell the time again and that was one of our successes. However, despite having her own literacy tutor for 6 years my wife still can't grasp all the letters of the alphabet and the tutors eventually called a halt said she had reached as far as she every would.

You are right about patience and understanding being the key. If someone is kind enough to just spend a minute or two letting someone complete their sentence that makes all the difference. We both find it so upsetting when we come across someone who just hasn't got time or patience. They wave Mrs A away with a hand and even just turn and walk off when she's in mid-sentence! Of course, if they catch me wrong I'll fly at them! That doesn't help though as my wife then gets more upset. The staff at Mrs A's new day centre are very good as they have got the patience. Mrs A is getting more confident talking to others as a result.

I never imagined when I was a hot-headed, impatient and selfish youngster that I would ever be in this position of caring for someone.

[boxtops]

Andyvon - much respect to you.

[tastymorsel]

bless you Andy and how lucky your wife is to have you.

[Andyvon]

Well, thank you both.

That's what Social Services say Tastymorsel. Consequently, that's why they say they can't provide us with more support as most people in my wife's position are isolated and have no one. They say they have to spend their limited resources and funding on those isolated people and it's most economical and efficient to have me at home caring for my wife. Believe me, we had so many meetings years ago trying to get some help. In the end we gave up. The last few years we usually get through one day at a time.

My wife's incredibly happy though and that's all I care about really. She only lives in the present and I think it must be wonderful to have no worries or concerns.

[sara3]

agreed. you are truly her rock :o)