Hmmm

[I_Tried]

Ok people firstly good morning, now my question.

Reading some previous posts(no not testpen's) there seems to be a lot of relationship  problems with affairs, breakdown of communication in relationships etc etc etc, what i was wondering is, is this a problem solely with British society or is it the norm across the globe and secondly why is this so common these days? If this question has already been asked somewhere i do apologise.

I_Tried xx

[georgit79]

God no, it's a problem wherever you are in the world! The answer? Don't have a relationship! Easy and hassle-free...quite boring, mind. It's a good job I like myself so much....

[I_Tried]

Geogit79,

Good morning Girl,4 days to go, HB xxx

[puttycake1]

I don't think it's any more or less of a problem here than elsewhere. Culturally, Britain has evolved into a society which discusses and analyses its problems far more than before, and that coupled with the means to discuss them with strangers - such as on here - means that the tendency to do so increases all the time. That's what I think anyway.

[Lisax]

i think its just a problem with men in general lol

[libertie]

Well Lisax you may be nearer the truth there than you think! People in general are bringing their children up to have higher expectations than say, 30 years ago, and I think this is especially true of young women who can go on to have well paid interesting careers ~ which in turn leads to them being independent!  They then expect - quite rightly - to be treated as an equal when it comes to relationships........no staying at home with the kids when hubby's down the pub etc etc! Bit of a generalisation I know, as there are bound to be plenty of guys out there who are happy to share the domestic chores who are'nt all gay! :o)

[lissyl78]

I agree with libertie and puttycake but also think that people want to have good happy relationships now whereas before it's always been 'what to do for the best'. People didn't get divorced and stayed in relationships even if they were bad ones. If something doesn't make us feel good, we walk away and try to find it elsewhere.

Or maybe with the state of the world nowadays, whether its natural disasters or struggling to get by financially - which nearly everyone I know is at the moment - we want something in our lives that is purely pleasurable and hassle-free and so look for it an a partner. Maybe that's why alcoholism and drug-taking is on the rise too? Lissy x

[I_Tried]

Ok guys point taken BUT,

How do you all explain the infidelity issue

[Lisax]

again its the men in the world (and some women) who think they are entitled to mess people about and sleep with who they want when they want

[Dakota]

IT - I think the infidelity issue has arisen becuse too many people are jumping into marriage with *really* thinking about it - just look at the amount of Celebs that are doing it then months later getting divorced.  BUT, I also think that we are being a lot more open with the problem, so maybe it hasn't changed in all these years, the women just put up with it less than they did in my grandparents day.  I could be wrong, it's just a thought.

[libertie]

More opportunity I suppose.....we work less hours have more money to spend and more time to spend it in!  Also the workplace has changed greatly and both sexes now work desk by desk.....so to speak! We can all picture the scenario......drinks after work....team building weekends......need I go on!!

[vehelpfulguy]

You ask how do explain the infidelity issue.

Well for a man to be unfaithful he has to have a woman involved, and the woman is not always single.

Many woman in marriages are unfaithful, it is not just men.

[Lisax]

i know that really just feeling a bit bitter towards men at the moment

[I_Tried]

Dak,

Maybe we are more open about our problems but, surely this shouldn't lead us to jump into anyones and everyones bed at the first instance of appreciation, I feel maybe we are more open but I don't thin our parents era or our Grandparents era they screwed around like it is today, today just seem everywhere you look they are doing it, I mean in my office you got  a guy who whilst at work is trying to get into another womans knickers and she already has a partner , and doesn't do anything to deter the guy at work from making his feelings known to her and they guy at work has a girlfriend at home who is having cam sessions with another guy of the internet and when i mean cam session i MEAN THE DIRTY RUDE STUFF, so how can we say we are being more openabout our problems when we are still with the same person yet screwing another 5 outside of the relationship, just make me wonder is this really the degradation of society or is it again the ease with which people can get away with screwing each other without being caught.

sorry if i lost myself in that post and hope it makes sense to you all. do come back people cos am really intrigued by this behaviour or pattern of behaviour and also is the saying once an adulterer always an adulterer true. xxx

[libertie]

Sorry, did'nt mean to imply that it was just the guys who were unfaithful.......when I said more opportunity I meant for both sexes!  True equal opportunity I suppose especially where I work :o/

[lissyl78]

I thought you sorted things out with your boyfriend, Lisax? x

As for the infidelity thing, I think our generation is a lot more selfish than the ones before - I don't mean selfish as a throwaway insult but that we are more concerned with our own wants and needs without giving too much consideration for others. It's how our countries are run and consequently what our society has become too.

I think people should be happy in their relationships and everyone deserves it but I think infidelity is unacceptable. If I was in a relationship that didn't fulfil me, I'd try to sort it out but if nothing could be done I'd leave it. I'd wait until I was single before I got involved with anyone else. x

[Lisax]

well i got the oringinal apology but now he doesnt know what he wants.... apparently he wants to slow things down a bit... i think that could just be his way though of gradually contacting me less and less till its over... dont think he has the courage to finish things once and for all