strange falling out - how i handle it?

[joko]

I met a woman & we became friends (just friends, I'm female too) after a while we realised that we had a friend in common-well he was my friend & her ex of 6 years. She still loved him & was convinced they would get back together at someday (she's a psychic so is convinced)
So, I arranged to put them back in touch, they met, had sex, had a great night & he said he'd be in touch-he wasn't. She texted him constantly, sometimes nice, sometimes angry-he never replied. He said he had a girlfriend & it was complicated as her family are bad news & he wanted to sort things out before they could be together properly-that never happened. I think he became annoyed at her texts & because she constantly referred to me in them, she would say things like, "your horrid...& she agrees with me!" thereby implying that I'm sitting with her bytching about him!
She tells everyone everything about herself-personal private things, about others too. She once told a roomful something I'd told her privately - in front of me! She seemed to think it was ok because 'they won't tell anyone' !!! So, I know why he's upset.
She's gone on about him for months & when I found out about the texts, I banned her from talking to me about him-I told her I'm not taking sides & I don't want to fall out with an old friend over it. Too late!
Things were fine for while & then I got a text saying she loved my friendship but needed to keep away for a while because she was having a kind of break down about this guy -& I remind her of him!
I try to do a favour-now I've lost two friends!
I know she's hurting & I feel for her & I am angry at his behaviour, but why take it out on me? Surely this is when she needs friends.
Am I justified in being offended by this & angry that that's what I mean to her?
I feel I am, but what do I do when (& if) she gets back in touch when she's feeling better?
Any thoughts?

[Poppy]

It sounds as though you've been a good friend. For the time being though I'd respect her wishes and give her some space. She's obviously got a really unhealthy preoccupation with this man (she must have realised this)and it will probably do her good to have a break from everything to do with him even though it's unfortunate that this includes you. Be patient and if she does get in touch re-establish the rule that neither of you mention him to one another ever again. I can certainly understand why you're offended and upset with her but it really sounds as though she's suffering from a patch of poor mental health (which happens to us in the same way as we can have bad physical health) and she really can't be blamed for this. Just an opinion but hope it helps!

[KittyGlitter]

She sounds like she has a few issues that are causing you hassle, none of it being your fault. From what you have said, she doesn't come across as a very good friend. Are you sure you want to remain friends with her?

[joko]

To be honest, I just don't know.

She lives at the end of my street so I'm bound to bump into her now and again (although she's hugely obese and barely leaves the house-her kids do everything for her)

The psychic thing does annoy me, as every thing anyone does - she claims she knew they would or she made them do it -after the fact! - and then acts all smug about! She takes credit for things like good luck, the weather, everything! -claiming she was responsible for it, yet not one single thing shes ever said about me has been true and all the things shes promised, like help to pass my driving test, keep the rain off for me etc, havent happened either. When I've challenged her abilities she has some excuse - at first I ignored it, but it got draining, being made to feel like my life is under her control. She knew I was a sceptic and tried to twist everything to sound like it was proof. She even claims 'they' are after her because 'she knows too much', bad ghosts are after her too, and if anything happens she thinks its 'them'. 'Them', I think, are the government and satanic groups who don't like her white witchery.

Her cat was run over and she said it was a warning from 'them'. I know satanic cults do weird stuff but its everything with her.

She is very competetive too. Every thing I do, she can better kind of thing - even my job, that I've trained for many years to do! One day, I sang a line of song, just to myself, as you do, I am quite a good singer so she spent the rest of the night bursting into loud song. I'd never heard her sing a note before ever!

As I say, I just let it go over my head but after whats happened I've rethought everything and its started to really annoy me.

Having said all that, she's kind and generous (though very weird about her chocolate!) I always have a laugh with her and I do like her. Its a very strange situation!

[flipflop104]

Sorry to be harsh but sounds like you would be better off with this woman out of your life for good.