how can my brother meet women?

[flipnflap]

My brother has hit 50 and is divorced, living alone in relative isolation, and self-employed although quite successful. Like most blokes it seems, he prefers younger women but hardly ever meets anybody these days. After bad experiences Internet Dating, he refuses to do that again. I'd like him to find someone special, but I don't know anybody suitable and/or single. Anyone got any suggestions as to what he can do to increase his chances of finding love? One friend reckons cookery courses are a good bet, another suggests he get a dog...

[jackthehat]

Do you have a personal reason for being quite so chippy on the subject, craftypig?

The full quote may be more useful, << many of the 'older' men in those relationships >>. Read it again, and I think you'll see what I mean.

[Marijn]

SOME men do make idiots of themselves, so do some women by wanting a toy boy or girl.Look at Hugh Heffner as an extreme example. But I don't think anyone is saying that ALL age gap relationships are a laughing stock.

[sara3]

I feel for you Jenna.. but would you be interested, generally speaking, in a 50+ man?

[askyourgran]

I think he needs to cultivate friendships with a few women before he decides. A friend of mine went on a cruise and met a nice guy, and another met his partner at a supermarket checkout. Another joined a bowling and cricket club and meets people in the social scene there. Has he any interests? It has been said love happens when you least expect it.

[jomifl]

Yoga classes...80% women (in leotards) should do the trick!

[S_C]

people of varying ages do meet up and become partners , some work out and others do not.
being the older person looking for this type of relationship selectively is very limiting and has its dangers.
this persons brother has already been " hurt " by internet dating , where i can only imagine he did exactly the same type of search.
the problem is not the internet dating , it is finding someone who is genuine and honestly looking for someone like him.
one danger is gold diggers, we have all seen these in the media , 60/70 year old marries a person in her 20's .
however this is not to say there are people out there who connect on a mental level and are of larger age differances.
it is mearly stating that it is limiting the aviable options for the seeker and leaving them open for the " players " where at some point it is enevitable the two would meet. unless thy were extremely lucky.
it should be noted that age differance relationships are not limited to only older men with younger women , as the same can be said about their opposites.

Joining clubs of interest and meeting new people is the best way of finding new friend's as you will already have the interest in comon

[Craftypig]

I dont have a reason for being so chirpy about it, you said that older men are being chumps I asked you why? I'm curious as to why you feel that way? There is no need to be condescendingly insulting either...

"the full quote may be more reasonable" I did post the full quote...

[Marijn]

Yoga classes is a very good idea. I worked in a yoga class were there were about twenty women and only one man

[jackthehat]

Except you didn't........I clearly said 'many'.

[Craftypig]

Im not disputing the number, I'm asking how you come to that conclusion?

[jackthehat]

Because I have seen 'many' such relationships, of course. Because I have spoken to other people who have also seen, experienced themselves, or had friends/family in such relationships.

Yes, I *have* seen ones that work and, (to reiterate) they'll be the ones that are a meeting of minds.......

[Eve]

My instinctive answer would be no sis. There are exceptions to everything of course but I guess thinking hypothetically I'd think of someone 50+ as someone who is more than likely have been and done a lot of the things I want to do (namely start a family) and potentially not be looking to start the phase of my life than I am. I can only generalise though as everyone is different.

If I met the man of my dreams who was 50+ would I consider it? Well, never say never - if he makes me happy then great but would I consider going to a dating site or event to meet guys in that age range specifically? No I wouldn't.

I'm thinking more long term relationships though rather than just dating though I'm at that stage now where I'm not really interested in just faffing about dating generally.

Oh dear...tick tick tick!

[sara3]

you've got plenty of ticking years yet, sis ;o)

[Old_Geezer]

Tell him to join a social club, get to know folk, and make the effort. Unless, of course, he isn't fussed about finding a mate. It isn't compulsory, and has both cons and pros.

[NOX]

I'm 51 and I never have problems meeting people purely because I have a largeish social circle which incorporates people of all ages. I never specifically go looking and the last 3 women I have been out with have been a Ukrainian girl I met in her 20's in Russia (met her through business, lovely girl-still good friends and business associates) a teacher in her 40's ( met her in a pub but simply not compatible on lots of levels and became apparent early on) and a girl I asked out who works in one of the local shops ( in her 30's, again very different people and not compatible). If he wants to get involved he just needs to keep his eyes open and get out there. For sure he'll ask girls out and be rejected but just view that as a filtering of the first wave of unsuitable partners, I really don't think unless he's totally isolated he needs to be joining things to try to snare one- nor do I think that he's necessarily unrealistic about finding a younger partner, but if that's his sole criteria he might want to examine his motives, as they might be what's putting women off. I personally am not hung up about age, a woman can be older or younger but we really do have to connect or I simply wont waste much of my time on a romantic level.Just wander through life open to the idea of a relationship with ANYONE and eventually the right person will appear.

[Sade]

Hmm, I wonder what he is really after when he says he prefers younger women. Does that mean 'fit' women? ie- not saggy? If so, bleargh. 50 and divorced- I agree with those who say he might have to lower his sights a bit. Consider what those younger women are looking for too- more than likely not a 50 year old divorcee. What is it with men and looks? Can't he just socialise more and wait until he finds someone who is ace, makes him laugh, who he feels comfortable with AND fancies? If he is only looking for a younger woman I doubt there will be much longevity in the relationship, unless he wants to be a dad in a few years?

[VHG]

>>>Why are people suggesting dating sites

Neither Spice or Saga, the two sites suggested, are dating sites.

They are SOCIAL sites where you can discuss things, go to events, meet people and so on. Many couples go on Saga and Spice events.

If a relationship comes from using those sites, fine, but they are not dating sites per se.

[DTCwordfan]

Either just let him get on with his life - but gently encourage him not to be a workalcoholic.

Failing that buy Russian or Fillipino or Thai?