undertaker

[barffy-59]

i went to see my sister in her coffin,why do undertakers give them a scary smile and how do they do it.my husband mum and dad all looked scary,why cant they leave them as they looked when they die.and why do they take them out and put them in a cardboard box when Cremated. if you can answer these please do thank you

[andy-hughes]

I have no knowledge, but an educated guess suggests that the 'smile' is simply the result of muscle tension.

If bodies are cremated in a cardboard box, i would suggest it is simply to facilitate quicker and more environmentally friendly disposal, but again, I am not speaking from any knowledge. Be interested if anyone can speak with authority about this.

[ummmm]

Their mouth is stapled closed that's why.

[naomi24]

I've been with people when they've died, but I never go to see them at the undertakers. I'd rather just remember them as they were in life.

Bodies aren't taken out of coffins and put into cardboard boxes for cremation. Various types of coffin can be bought, including cardboard and wooden ones especially designed for cremation.

[naomi24]

I agree doc.

[ummmm]

It depends how they looked in death Naomi. My Dad died of cancer and at the end he was yellow and skeletal. The undertaker, luckily knew him, made him look as much like his old self as possible. The image of him at the chapel of rest is better than the image of him the day he died.

[naomi24]

My father too Ummmm.

[naomi24]

Sorry, I meant he died in the same way - not that he looked better at the undertakers. My husband saw him there and he most definitely didn't.

[ummmm]

They made my Dad fat again....besides the mouth, he almost looked like he did before he got ill.

[Goodsoulette]

having been with a lot of people when they die, trust me, they look a lot better with that smile than they do when they die. Sorry to hear of your ;loss and I hope you remember her how she was when she was with you.

[naomi24]

My dad's facial muscles had collapsed so nothing could be done. The undertaker thought it best that my mother and I didn't see him so my husband went in to look and agreed. (I was 7 months pregnant at the time so it was probably a wise decision).

[marval]

Theyn all seem to have that smile I know my Mum and Dad did. They looked so thin and I suppose slightly scary. They were both cremated in the coffins chosen for them, that is what they were in when we went to see them at the undertakers.

[ummmm]

It's not a smile. It's where they staple the mouth shut to stop it hanging open.

[ttfn]

barffy - sorry to read of your loss. I was with all my loved ones when they died so I had no wish to see them at the undertakers. However, when my best friend had died I was asked by an elderly lady to place some flowers in her hand the night before the funeral - I did and wished I had not been asked to so do. I think it is better by far to remember people as they were alive, but would always encourage people to attend the funerals as the last sign of respect.

[tamborine]

coffins have an inner cardboard lining (box) that slips out for quicker cremation.

[Rodge2]

How do you know this Moriarty?

[Lindylou]

Count your blessings you weren't asked to identify them and they'd been 'tidied up'. Everytime a body is moved - from hospital to mortuary to funeral home etc - the body has to be identified. I've done it for four different relatives. Aunty,Grandmother,my dad and my mum. The very first time I had to do it I was 17 years old.... still remember it. First time I'd seen a real person who was dead. Not 'prettied up' but just as they were virtually immediately after they'd died. My Gran asked how did she look? I just said, at peace, its like she wasn't there any more. What else do you say? I'm now well over 60 and it still haunts me.

[Buenchico]

>>>"why do they take them out and put them in a cardboard box when Cremated"

Myth!

I could have chosen from hundreds of links to prove my point but I thought that a local authority website might carry a bit more weight than some others:
http://www.tameside.gov.uk/bereavement/faqs