Development of a 4 year old

[bookboo]

My son will be 4 next month and I've noticed that his cousin (a girl) who is 6 weeks older is able to draw faces, letters, numbers etc whereas my son cant do any of that. He does not have good control of the pencil/paintbrush as yet so tends to just scribble and gets bored within 5 minutes. Can anyone tell me if this is normal and if perhaps it's a gender thing at this age? Also, he seems to be ambidextrous at this point as he doesn't use any one hand.

[jkelly24]

Does he attend playgroup or school yet? If so I would have thought they would have picked up on any difficulties they thought he may be having. It may be he's just not interested in drawing or painting. If you are concerned you could always see your health visitor and maybe they can assess him and either put your mind at rest or advise you if they think there is a problem.

[bookboo]

Lol, okay thanks.

[ummmm]

Different talents.

One of my children has a beautiful singing voice. One is tone deaf. One can draw. One can't.

Don't worry.

[NOX]

All kids are different, I have one son whose an artist and another who holds a pen like a club and sort of stabs the paper when he writes his barely legible scrawl ( both adults btw), theyre all different, and I'm sure he'll have other talents:)

[chelle7272]

Mine was the same, didn't show any interest or skill in arty stuff at that age at all.

About to go to 6th fiorm now to do art and games design, and he's not bad if I do say so myself.

[Iolanthe]

It could just be his age, and children of the same age all develop at different rates but, to put your mind at rest, you might need to check whether or not he has a mild condition called dyspraxia. Dyspraxia specifically relates to the development of a child’s motor skills (their ability to make smooth, co-ordinated movements). It's not at all life-threatenenig, so don't worry too much.

Both boys/young men next door to me were diagnosed with this when they were children, and they have both developed into "normal" adults. Both have learned to drive, one is a car mechanic, and the other is doing A levels.

Things to look out for are:
"Movement and co-ordination
If your child has dyspraxia, they will have problems with movement and co-ordination. They may find the following difficult:

•playground activities such as hopping, jumping, running and catching or kicking a ball (they often avoid joining in because of their lack of co-ordination and may be at risk of becoming unfit)
•games including shape-sorter toys, building blocks and jigsaws
•using scissors and colouring pens (their drawings may appear to be scribbled and more childish than they should be for their age)
•fine movements such as handwriting, tying shoelaces, doing up buttons and using a knife and fork
•keeping still (they may swing or move their arms and legs a lot and find it hard to sit still)
•walking up and down stairs
•getting dressed
A child with dyspraxia may also bump into objects or drop things, and may fall over a lot. This makes them appear awkward and clumsy." Quoted from the NHS website.

Having said all this, we always worry when our children don't appear to reach development levels at the same time as others. My father was a very wise man (a teacher, as was I) who told me when I worried about my older daughter possibly being dyslexic (problems with reading), that children stay on a plateau of learning for a time, then move up to the next stage, as and when they are ready and, in my 30+ years of teaching, I found that children need different methods of educational stimulation. I used to say that this daughter used to fall over the flower pattern on the carpet when she was little but she tap dances, acts and sings in shows, and all my worries when she was tiny were completely unfounded. One child will react to listening/talking, another to reading/looking, and some will react to other, various methods of communication. A 4 year old child, in the main, has a fairly short attention span, so you will need a number of activities ready for him/her to move on to. Don't choose something that will be too long for his concentration level, and vary the type of activity you offer. Gradually you should see some changes, with patience and perseverance, and if you can find an area of activity that your child enjoys, try to develop it.

Best wishes and don't worry.......easier said than done, I know.

[Brinjal]

Don't compare children. They are all different. And in particular don't compare boys with girls. They develope differently

[rowanwitch]

he may be stronger on verbal/auditory learning and slower in visual spatial this will just be one of his quirks but I think generally girls are a bit quicker in the early stages...

[ummmm]

What about the 3rd one Vibes????

[sophie_1003]

Completely normal; I'm doing assessments on the nursery children I teach at the moment (sounds awful but is much scarier for me than the children!) and hardly any of them are at the stage your sons cousin is at. I've got lots of scribblers and loads who aren't interested in drawing at all.
If you want to encourage him in drawing skills perhaps find ways of doing it in a more gross motor way; having big paper on a wall so that as long as the pen is touching the paper he can move his whole arm and still make marks for example; he may also find this more interesting than on a small scale so might concentrate for longer.

[LoftyLottie]

My son was never interested in drawing or painting and flatly refused to do it when he went to playgroup. He was forced into it at school and is useless. He is very intelligent, a brilliant musician and electronics/network engineer................................... don't worry.

His writing has always been diabolical too. Thank goodness for computers.

We are all different

[bookboo]

Thank you all, that puts my mind at rest.

[Kassee]

Girls are generally better with pencil work at this age, often boys are better at climbing, kicking a ball, and running. I think even at 15/16 girls are more academic than boys, and boys catch up later. But this is generalizing the whole thing - all kids are different. I wouldn't compare them. All children are ambidextrous to a certain age, most of them gradually prefer using one hand. But a few remain ambidextrous. You could encourage him to draw and colour in pictures with him, good for his concentration too ! But avoid making an issue out of it. He is still very young. Praise him for whatever he does and don't compare him to other children.