If you saw a friends husband with another woman.....

[crystalbee27]

and it looked more romantic date than business lunch would you tell her?

[joggerjayne]

Lofty ...

If your friend's husband is seen with another woman, you won't HAVE to tell her, because I will tell your friend, LOL, LOL, LOL !!

[LoftyLottie]

Woofy. But suppose you said to a friend "I saw your husband today in..................." and they hadn't known that their husband had been there. Different if the husband was alone, but if he was with another lady for any reason whatsoever, it would open up a can of worms.

I know you are a discrete person :o)

[Davethedog]

I understand JJ's point, but I think we tend to see these things in isolation and how we think we would react, rather than the emotion that would be involved.

By telling you are going to inflict unimaginable emotional pain, worry and unbalance their lives I for one wouldn't want to inflict that on any friend of mine.

[LoftyLottie]

Jayne

:o)

[starone]

Sometimes life is so painful and difficult isn't it? But I still like being here.

[LoftyLottie]

Actually I don't think I would say hello to a friends husband if he was with another woman in a restaurant or something. I would pretend I hadn't seen him and keep it to myself. If he called out 'Hello' I would go over and speak. If he didn't acknowledge me it might well be for a good reason.

[LoftyLottie]

The good outweighs the bad Starbuck. Well, most of the time................

[ladybirder]

I would find it very hard to forgive a friend who knew my partner was seeing somebody else and did not tell me. I would definitely want to know. If one person has seen him with someone else then there's a good chance that others have as well and that you are being gossiped about. It would have to be a close friend of course, not acquaintances. And I would do the same, especially if that friend had admitted there was trouble in the marriage. And like JJ I would keep her confidences absolutely. She is my friend not him.

[woofgang]

But why if he was with a woman would that automatically open a can of worms?
My husband used to go off to lunches as a part of his business, with both men and women and when I was at work, I had colleagues of both genders that I used to lunch with as well. Now if they are doing "just like the ivy, I'll cling to you" that's something else and in those circs I would be over there like a shot saying how nice it was to see him and that I hadn't seen him for a while although I of course chat to (wife's name) often yadda yadda because i am an evil and vengeful cow. And yes, if she was a close friend, I would tell her, risking opening the can and losing my friend because that is how I would like to be treated. But I repeat, innocent until proven.....

[starone]

I certainly hope so lottie, I certainly hope so. (said in a very sad voice and ended with a deep sigh).

[joggerjayne]

LB, I think I saw your husband coming out of the Pelirocco with a redhead in a nurse's outfit.

LOL

[LoftyLottie]

Ladybirder, if a close friend had admitted their was trouble in the marriage and that she/he thought their spouse was seeing someone else, that might make me think harder and I might well tell them I had seen their spouse with someone else. But it would have to be prompted by the friend in first place.

I would never wish to deliver such a shock to a friend because none of us know the real facts about anybody else's relationships and what the facts are. Everyone of us has things we would never discuss with anybody - not even our very close friends, surely.

Just my opinion though.

[ladybirder]

Well Lottie if you were my friend and didn't tell me I don't think I'd be able to forgive you. Not saying I'm right and you're wrong, I just know that's what I'd be like.

JJ. that was me darling LOL.

[woofgang]

You are right Lottie, we can't know which is why I try to adopt the view of do as you would be done by.

[LoftyLottie]

We are all different in the way we handle things. I suppose there is no right or wrong. I just know how I would feel if a friend sprung that news on me. I wouldn't like it. I suppose it comes from not wanting others to feel sorry for me. I like to be in control.

[LoftyLottie]

I didn't see your post Woofy, before I posted. I suppose we think the same really - "Do as you would be done by" :o).

It may not be right, but we at least are doing our best.

[joggerjayne]

You have great legs, LB !

=0)

[joggerjayne]

ps. You dropped your whip outside the Regency. I handed it in there.

[woofgang]

Lottie i think our best is all we can do. We might come up with different solutions but at least we will have given it honest thought.