Racism is Prevalent - I experienced it indirectly!

[rozia]

Had a meeting, which was held by chief of the NHS Trust i work in. There were 3 tables set for people to come and sit down at. I was first in so i sat at a table, an English lady came in after me, she didn't say hello to me, but said hello to the other 3 that were in the room before me (chief and his team) and sat at a different table. Another English lady came in and sat at her table and it carried on with several more English ladies sitting at that table, i was still sat alone :-( then an English bloke came in and he said'oh dear you sat here all alone, i'll come and join you, he sat at my table and another bloke did the same, and also a English lady sat at my table, only because the 2 blokes were sat there. I was the only Pakistani/Asain in the room, then a Jamaican lady came in, but sat with the others on the other table,i suppose she saw the bigger group and wanted in....The obvious reason as to why they didn't sit at my table was because i was asain, and they were being indirectly racist, i felt the atmosphere in there and the chiefs face said it all, he looked a bit annoyed. The guy that initially sat at my table, made a comment about how people are so obviously full of nastiness, i didn't react to that, i was just shocked myself!! i wasn't imaging it, because he saw it aswell.

It made me sick, i was born in Britain, and brought up here, and i am much more educated and can speak so fluently in English than some of the English people, but the colour of my skin will always be an obstacle....which is very sad :-( Hope i don't offend anyone on here.

[rozia]

NOX and china, i have nothing against your opinions, but i really was not looking for people to think bad of me on ab, i had to think twice about posting this, and when i did, i knew i would get some kind of backlash, and i did, i am really upset with it.

[owdhamer]

I walked into a pub in Bala mid Wales there was a mixture of english and welsh being spoken as soon as i ordered some drinks it was all welsh ,racism?

[percypineapple]

if I walked into a room where there three tables, one empty, one with a coloured person, and one with whites, I would sit with the whites, not because i am in anyway racist, but I would worry that the coloured person might not speak good english, and a conversation would be embarrasing for me, to keep saying " sorry, could you say that again". i also think that if the next person in was coloured, they would probably sit with the coloured person.unless they had been born and bred in Britain, then they would probably be more racist than any white person and go and sit with the whites.
I have seen this so many times, that I now make a point of speaking to all coloured people that i meet at the baby and toddlers club ( I baby sit )just to see if they are really black or white under the skin. made some good friends who are proud to be black and promote their ethinic culture and are also very proud to be British.

[China Doll]

No one does think badly of you, some of us just disagree with your assessment of the situation, that's a big difference. If you're upset then that's a shame but still not going to make a difference to how people have answered from their perspective of the incident. Maybe go through and read the comments again, most were clear and well thought out and not calling you names or thinking badly of you.

[tamborine]

You watched each one come in but did you greet/welcome them, since you were already seated? If they then ignored your initial greeting then you could think it was racism and have said something along the lines of "I think I'm on the wrong table, I'll join you". That would diffuse the situation.

[rozia]

I know most were clear and thought out, its the name calling that offended me.

[China Doll]

So go look at the clear and thought out ones and stop dwelling on the name calling ones which I believe a moderator stepped in to sort out. This thread is mostly full of people trying to offer helpful opinions... not least the last point tambo just made which is also very good.

[sherrardk]

Maybe you should leave it be now and think what you could do in a similar situation in the future - maybe you could go to the next meeting with a plan so that you are not left sitting on your own (now it is not ideal, but better to do something positive than to dwell on a rubbish experience).

[rozia]

ok china, i get the point ;-)

[rozia]

thanks sherrard.x

[tamborine]

oi Rozia - dont ignore my advice - lol :)

[sherrardk]

No probs Rozia, it can be really hard to get your point across about something that has upset you (and then you get more cross and upset because no one seems to be 'on your side') - the people who didn't sit by you are the losers as they didn't get to chat to you, sod 'em!

[NOX]

I certainly don't think badly of you Rozia, I don't think many people and the ones who do, well, it says more about them than you. As I said vibes are impossible to convey, and actions don't always give a clear picture alone, but it is good advice not to dwell on anything negative. If you're happy and successful it really p1sses the nasty people off, so I'm happy just to spite them;-)

[rozia]

sorry tamb, not ignoring you, thanks. x