Crosswords0 min ago
The postmans last day...
It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the post through all kinds of weather to the same villages and towns.
When he arrived at the first house on his round, he was greeted by the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a cheque for £50.
At the second house they presented him with an 18-carat gold watch.
The family at the third house handed him a bottle of 15-year old Scotch whisky.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a dumb blonde in her lingerie. She took him by the arm and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When they went downstairs, the blonde cooked him a full English breakfast: Bacon, Eggs, Sausage & Tomato with freshly squeezed orange juice. As she was pouring him a cup of steaming coffee, he noticed a pound coin in the saucer.
'All this was just too wonderful for words,' he said, 'but what's the pound coin for?'
'Well,' said the dumb blonde, 'Last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that we should do something special for you'. 'I asked him what I should give you'.
He said, 'F**k him. Give him a quid...'
She smiled shyly and said, 'The breakfast was my idea.'
When he arrived at the first house on his round, he was greeted by the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a cheque for £50.
At the second house they presented him with an 18-carat gold watch.
The family at the third house handed him a bottle of 15-year old Scotch whisky.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a dumb blonde in her lingerie. She took him by the arm and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When they went downstairs, the blonde cooked him a full English breakfast: Bacon, Eggs, Sausage & Tomato with freshly squeezed orange juice. As she was pouring him a cup of steaming coffee, he noticed a pound coin in the saucer.
'All this was just too wonderful for words,' he said, 'but what's the pound coin for?'
'Well,' said the dumb blonde, 'Last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that we should do something special for you'. 'I asked him what I should give you'.
He said, 'F**k him. Give him a quid...'
She smiled shyly and said, 'The breakfast was my idea.'
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