AROUND THE HOUSE

[TheWinner]

Things found around the house in a story……..
I’ll start……..

Are you losing weight? you’re going down the DRAIN.
I hope you can CUSHION the fall. Or are you up the SPOUT,
with a bun in the OVEN? well don’t shout it from the ROOFTOPS.
You are the LIGHT of my life. I am buying a computer, (put it on my SLATE will you), apparently it is WIRELESS me old CHINA. Anyway, CLOCK this, we were watching
Titanic, (which was a SINKing ship), when I decided to do a TAP dance with Fred from next door. “I am the Lord of the dance, SETTEE”, but I don’t believe him, I’m no MUG.

I’m sure he has a GLASS eye. WATCH it Fred, or I’ll LAMP you one, then it will be
CURTAINS for you and I’ll throw in the TOWEL, so don’t try and soft SOAP me.

I went with Fred into the garden, I said you can read this and BOLT, but don’t FENCE those stolen goods, or GRASS me up, just SHED your clothes and come on, baby, LIGHT my FIRE.

We then went to the local club. Are you going to CHAIR this meeting?
as I think you are BASKET case and you have a LADDER in your tights. Now don’t NEEDLE me, you’re not SPONGE-ing off me, or giving me a load of FLANNEL.
I am not a DOORMAT. Hey your face is a PICTURE, but I’ll SHELVE it for now as I am going away on holiday, and I shall be sailing on the water, like a CUP AND SAUCER, so goodbye, and if I don’t see you through the week, I’ll see you through the WINDOW.

[Mick-Talbot]

You do know DT lives alone ?

[Jordyboy9]

cyclops,, please dont talk about me one eyes gone.

[Mick-Talbot]

I want a stewards enquiry ....AYG never even used CAPS

[NoMercy]

DT could drink us all under the TABLE.

[Prudie]

I'm only EAVESdropping on this thread

[TheWinner]

I'm loving it, thanks for the laughs guys.

[Mick-Talbot]

Why isn't DRINK in CAPS NOM ?

[askyourgran]

SHADDUPPAYAFACE Mick-T

[EcclesCake]

OK, I'm here to CHAIR meeting, you SHOWER.......

[TheWinner]

In real life, I have to go to BED as I have another busy day tomorrow, please keep the laughs coming, you are all brilliant! I will check back soon. Goodnight from TheWinner, your biggest FAN.

[DTCwordfan]

I'm LOGging these all down so Ed can FIRE us all but then he may think that is a GRATE threadand hang it off the AB monthly MANTELPIECE.

Anyone know any good RIDDLES or HEARThY jokes.

[chi-chi66]

my backs against the WALL, I could have HANDLEd it better I suppose, I'll have to IRON it out in the morning on the TELEPHONE.

[Mick-Talbot]

No CAPS for LIFE ........ very telling.

[EcclesCake]

I'd like to TABLE a MOTION (my cistern is playing up ;-) ), you'll be BOWLed over by it, actually if I told you what it was I would pull the RUG from under your feet so .....I'm going to keep you in SUSPENDERS!

[DTCwordfan]

We don't use CAPS or Condoms in this house for life, MT, good old fashioned CLING-FILM works perfectly well.

[Jordyboy9]

my daughter is getting married come and see her torso.