Sat. Nav.

[maggiebee]

Wasn't sure where to put this, so CB is as good as any.


I HAVE A SAT.NAV.

I have a little Satnav
It sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver's friend
It tells you where you are

I have a little Satnav
I've had it all my life
It’s better than the normal ones
My Satnav is my wife

It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
"It's thirty miles an hour", it says
"You're doing thirty five"

It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it's never ever
Safe to overtake

It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene

It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear.

I'm sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice

It fills me up with counselling
Each journey's pretty fraught
So why don't I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I'm properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And - keeps me warm in bed!
Despite all these advantages
And my tendency to scoff,
I do wish that once in a while
I could turn the damned thing off!

[gness]

I want a sat nav with a lovely lilting Irish voice that will sing me a song at the end of my journey.

[sherrardk]

I have only ever driven using a sat nav once and someone had programmed the voice to darth vada, it was really annoying.

[gness]

Oh Sherr. Think I would have thrown it out of the window!

[sunny-dave]

Aaaah go on, go on, go on, go on, go on,

[JonnyBoy12]

"Darth vada"? I have not heard of that person before. The voice of 'Darth Vader' might be quite interesting though.

Signed

The Star Wars branch of the Spelling Police.

[tonyav]

I want one that swears.

[gness]

Dave.....you sounded just like my brother! x

[gness]

"Would you ever turn this feckin corner!!!!" sort of thing Tony?

[tonyav]

Yep, thats the one gness.

[gness]

Think I may need a sat nav to get me, the laptop and the bottle of Rose from under this tree and up the garden to the house.