Alcohol Warning .a little humor off the net

[dustypuss]

Due to increasing products liability, alcoholic beverages manufacturers have accepted the Medical Association's suggestion that the following Warning labels be placed immediately on all bottles.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a Finance Specialist.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your face in.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that people are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your clothes.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you possess mystical Kung-Fu powers.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead to traffic signs and cones appearing in your home.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that people are laughing with you.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy.

[Smowball]

Lol, I like that - very good in deed!
(and very true!)

[sandyRoe]

I know for a fact that the traffic signs/cones one is true.

[excelsior-1]

very good, dustypuss.

[Arksided]

Dustypuss is sober then... sorry forgot the question ;-)

[dustypuss]

sober what's that

[Arksided]

I might try it sometime... sounds helpful.

[Duncer]

Sadly, most of these are familiar.

[tinkerbell23]

Sounds like a weekend in the life of tink!!!

That made me LOL ill be stealing this xxxx

[askyourgran]

Lol dustypuss. Can I just ask how does a Finance Specialist dance. And maybe another warning the Consumption of alcohol also causes brewers droop.

[Arksided]

the Consumption of alcohol also causes brewers droop.
I bet that's hard to keep up.

[dustypuss]

It wasn’t a Finance Specialist when I posted it was a name that rhymes with BANKER but it got changed